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The Matter of Manners

November 17, 1985

Alyce Best seems to believe that the teaching of good manners to young girls involves reinforcing attitudes of servility ("Now They're Putting on Their White Gloves," by Heidi Yorkshire, Nov. 8).

It is ludicrous and inappropriate for her to be instructing her young female students how to defer to men in restaurants, and then excusing herself by bowing to "tradition." "Traditional" treatment of women as second-class citizens has also included, at various times, preventing them from voting, holding political office, speaking in public and attending college.

I, too, am teaching my daughter "good manners"--but manners based on consideration of other people and recognition of the dignity and worth of each individual. Etiquette lessons which reflect yesterday's snobbish attitudes are not what our young people need today.

BONNIE K. SLOANE

Los Angeles

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