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Keillor's Garrison

December 01, 1985

Calendar's snotty little Outtakes item (Nov. 24) tells us that Garrison Keillor makes $171,186, characterizing it as "bad news" when Minnesota Public Radio is "begging for alms."

What does this figure actually mean?

That the dominant personality in public radio makes a moderate salary in entertainment-industry terms? That he makes only a tiny fraction of what he brings directly to American Public Radio and to public radio stations through pledges?

Keillor's fiance is referred to as a "Danish divorcee," a choice of words William Randolph Hearst would have heartily approved.

You quote that pismire muckraker (Minneapolis TV critic) Nick Coleman as saying Keillor's "longtime housemate" (Hearst might have sharpened that one) has "gone under deep cover." What exactly does this mean? Has she been moved to a safe house in Milwaukee by the APR Secret Police?

What could be the purpose of this article except to say, "See, he sings hymns on the air but he's just as corrupt as we are?"

Coleman and Calendar don't realize what kind of wasp's nest they've stepped on. You're used to dealing with people who acquire fame, not people who inspire affection.

What I'd like to ask yourselves in one of those fleeting moments when you examine your souls is, would this have been printed if Keillor hadn't been a celebrity of the moment? Would it have been printed a year ago?

You don't have to tell me, I already know.



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