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Some Messages for the Motor Morons

May 17, 1986

After involuntarily spending an extra 15 minutes on the freeway, I wish to address the Motor Morons of America.

This odious coalition is composed of the brainless clods who cannot resist slowing from 60 m.p.h. to 8 m.p.h. to view roadside accidents (usually something as astonishing as a tow truck parked on the shoulder), thereby causing additional collisions when normal drivers slam into these suddenly inert fools, and backing up traffic for miles.

If the cost weren't prohibitive, I'd recommend that the number of California Highway Patrol officers ordered to the scene of an accident be doubled--half to assist the victims and half to arrest the vehicular vermin who slow down to watch.

So to the members I submit the following: If your asinine acts are the result of your appetite for wreckage and carnage, stay at home and watch the news or rent the appropriate movies. If your stupidity stems from a need to see emergency vehicles, then spend your time at a hospital emergency room--but in either case, get off the road and let those who know how to drive do so unabated by the hazards of your ineptitude.

PETER SACKS

Huntington Beach

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