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Benefits of Stay-at-Home Mothering

September 28, 1986

Re "Working Mom Is Plagued by Guilt" by Pamela Cantor (Sept. 7): Bored stay-at-home mothers can make life exciting and worthwhile by participation in a myriad of ego-boosting, meaningful volunteer activities and classes. No job is more important and intelligence-demanding than guiding a young life. Many mothers refuse the responsibilities and headaches of handling this monumental situation intelligently and imaginatively, possibly because they lack self-discipline and awareness.

Gratifying motherhood is not easy, but time and strength invested bring dividends that cannot be counted in dollars. (Did we have so much juvenile delinquency when traditional family units were maintained?)

It's ignorant to presume that only mothers with jobs outside homes have children who "learn that they need to rely on themselves to remember . . . or suffer the consequences if they don't. They will become more independent and self-confident."

Stay-home mothers who establish rules have children who learn self-sufficiency, independence, self confidence, plus meaningful values. Motherhood as a career is as successful as the mother determines it shall be. When it is meaningful, the mother will not live with the life-long regret that "they grow up too fast."

I speak as a professional woman who worked at motherhood, civic involvement, synagogue involvement, and other interests, and who has enviable relationships with exemplary adult offspring. When lauding outside-working mothers, let's not minimize those with different horizons.

MRS. C. LEWIS

Westchester

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