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Why Is This Guy Laughing?

November 01, 1987

"There was an armored car robbery in midtown Manhattan. They got away with $4.5 million. The street value was $11,000."

"Ronald Reagan has a new decal for his limo. He takes off the coat-of-arms and replaces it with another sign that says 'This country carries $5 in change.' "

"The new austerity: A yuppie is sitting with his girl friend in Elaine's and says, 'This calls for drastic measures. We'll have to live on my salary.' "

"Ronald Reagan's latest health report says that he's as sound as a dollar."

"Paul Newman chastised me about dining with the Reagans at the White House. We split company over politics. I cleaned out my pantry and took down the Paul Newman salad oil, spaghetti sauce and popcorn with his picture on the labels, and gave them to my secretary when she came back from lunch at quarter to 5. She looked at the labels and said, 'Gee, I didn't even know he was missing.' "

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