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OUTTAKES THE SEQUEL

A Hard Day's Plug

November 08, 1987

A mysterious but peaceful activist group calling itself the Advertising Police recently sent the following letter to Calendar:

When Nike used the Beatles' "Revolution" to sell sneakers, it was unfortunately only the beginning. Our organization has been heroically fighting this rampant desecration of the Fab Four's sound. Some of the ad campaigns we've already uncovered:

"Strawberry Cheesecake Forever" (Sara Lee).

"Give Peas a Chance" (Libby's).

"I Want to Hold a Hamm's" (Hamm's beer).

"All You Need Is Luvs" (Luvs diapers).

"While My Hoover Gently Sweeps" (Hoover vacuums).

"Eight Plays a Week" (California Lottery).

"Zesterday" (Zest soap).

"I Want You (She's So Hefty)" (Hefty trash bags).

"I'm a User" (The Schick Center).

"You Always Give Us Your Money" (Phil Rizzuto for the Money Store).

"Carry That Freight" (Ryder trucks).

"Here, There and Underwear" (Fruit of the Loom).

The fight continues. By the way, as a secret underground advertising force battling for the betterment of the industry, we cannot divulge our address and phone number.

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