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Martinez and Sneak Sales of Pets to Labs

February 11, 1988

Al Martinez Riddles:

Q. How can Al Martinez be so full of hot air?

A. It's easy when he is sorely ignorant of the issues he writes about.

Q. How many Al Martinezes does it take to feel compassion and kindness?

A. A number that high doesn't exist.

Q. What does Al Martinez do for enjoyment?

A. Run over puppies, then insult the people who rescue them.

Q. How does Al Martinez get down from his ivory tower?

A. He doesn't.

Q. What is this thing called Al Martinez?

A. A heartless, apathetic, cowardly fungus that grows on people who have no idea what they're talking about.

Q. What is the world of Al Martinez like?

A. A cold, distant, lonely world where qualities like compassion, empathy, kindness and respect for all life are nonexistent.


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