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Men Aren't as Bad as Column Suggests

June 26, 1992

Re "Screaming, Demands--What Is It With Men?" (by Robin Abcarian, June 16):

The behavior of the woman interested in renting Abcarian's condominium was clearly exemplary, but many men would have behaved in the same way. Polite behavior, even in business situations, is a quality of decent human beings, not a monopoly of women.

As regards Abcarian's other example, the raucous conversation of the salesmen which she identified as a typical male habit, the high decibel level was probably directly related to the amount of beer consumed. Excessive drinking is practiced by both sexes, and the younger the men and women involved, the more equal the distribution between the sexes appears to be.

My guest and I were recently "entertained" while trying to have dinner at a well-known restaurant by a group of four young women college undergraduates. No one in the entire restaurant was able to hear any conversation but theirs.

Finally, I would like to say a word about the one-upmanship which men probably do engage in much more frequently than women. The traditional, aggressive social role of men is well known and need not be repeated here. But I have noticed that feminists seem nearly as likely as traditionally oriented women to choose men who engage in one-upmanship as their friends, husbands or lovers.

To have a lasting influence on men's behavior, maybe women should favor more modest men, as Abcarian appears to have done.

WALTER JANSEN

Riverside

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