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High Life: A WEEKLY FORUM FOR HIGH SCHOOL STUDENTS : It's Understood That Parents Just Don't Understand

July 15, 1993

You stay out too late. You see that same group of friends too much. You're always eating. The list of conflicts, rules and misunderstandings between parents and children seems to expand wildly during the teen-age years. High Life wonders, "What is the one thing about teen-agers that parents need to understand better?"

"Parents just don't understand that a lot of teens are more mature than they realize. They tend to treat us more like children and not as young adults."

Derek Whang, 17,

senior, University High School

"They need to understand that we're still learning. This is the time we're learning the most and we're not perfect. But they're not perfect either, and they need to be more understanding."

Rose Bae, 14,

freshman, Los Alamitos

"They should give us more space and trust us more."

Joe Moreno, 16,

junior, El Modena

"They need to learn that although we are young, we're not too young to have our own opinions and reasons for those opinions. Parents need to understand that at our young age, even though we don't have much experience, we have competent opinions."

J. Ruben Gonzalez, 17,

senior, Pacifica

"They need to understand that you always need to sit down and talk. That's what my mom and I do."

Autumn BenoMorris, 15,

sophomore, Los Alamitos

"We're smarter than our parents think, and they don't need to hover over us for every little thing. We deserve more trust and responsibility."

Colleen Morris, 17, and Jake Bollins, 18,

seniors, Pacifica

"The pressures at school and how hard it is; they just don't understand what we go through daily."

Darshana Shah, 17,

senior, Sunny Hills

"This is the '90s. They don't understand us, and they need to let us be more responsible."

Karisti Bolle, 16,

senior, El Modena

"That we need freedom. Parents don't understand that kids like to be on their own a lot. Kids need freedom--it's a part of growing up. Curfews are stupid."

Nathan Butterfield, 16,

junior, Los Alamitos

"Boy problems. We can handle them, and parents don't need to be too protective."

Monica Jhaveri, 16,

junior, Sunny Hills

"The way we think about things. We think more like kids do, not like adults do."

Sarah Drace, 16,

junior, Buena Park

"That we are mature, too."

Vanessa Bair, 15,

junior, El Modena

"That teen-agers should be able to hang out with whoever we want without parents judging us or making us hang out in the house all the time like prisoners."

Nicole Berry, 15,

sophomore, Los Alamitos

"Parents need to understand that teen-agers know everything and that parents don't know what they're talking about. They should keep quiet more often."

Ian Cheesman, 16,

senior, Pacifica

"They never let us do what we want to do. We need more freedom."

Josef Link, 14,

freshman, El Modena

"Parents need to be more in touch with teen-age emotions and the way we think."

Chloe Berman, 15,

sophomore, Woodbridge

"Our problems, like our emotions. It seems like parents don't understand what we're actually going through, even though they say they've been there before."

Cindi Berzansky, 15,

sophomore, University

"That teens need to live their own lives and make mistakes for themselves."

Mark VanDenburg, 18,

senior, Fullerton

"More freedom. We need to be able to try stuff on our own without parental interference."

Krys Snetsinger, 15,

sophomore, Woodbridge

"How teen-agers' situations at school with friends are different. (Sometimes friends) are not going to be perfect little angels like parents want them to be."

Jeff Blackmun, 16,

junior, Los Alamitos

"We are living in a different time than them; there are more pressures now than they could imagine in their time. They need to understand that we are making decisions that they aren't a part of. It's not like the Beav's family, where we go to our parents for every little thing. This isn't a 'Leave It to Beaver' world."

Gerry McCann, 17,

senior, Pacifica

"They need to take the good with the bad. We have strong and weak points. They need to understand both."

Allison Young, 16,

junior, Buena Park

"That teen-agers need their space. Parents shouldn't bug them about things or try to find out what they're doing all the time."

Amy Cole, 16,

junior, El Modena

"When we're in the teen years, we need parents to be friends. We need help through these difficult times, because it's not easy for us and it's not easy for them. We need parents to talk to us."

Geoff Ching, 16,

junior, Tustin

"That there is more pressure today, and we have to grow up fast. Some parents don't see things from a teen's perspective. Life is crazy."

A. J. Billings, 17,

senior, Pacifica

Responses to this week's question were gathered by Trisha Ginsburg.

Next Week's Hot Topic:

What's your favorite thing to see or do at the Orange County Fair?

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