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Warren Farrell's Myth: Victor or Victim?

August 22, 1993

Re "New Role for Men: Victim" (Aug. 9): It disturbs me that the editors of The Times, who should be enlightened enough not to promote the ranting of those who campaign against civil rights, would nonetheless give free press to an anti-feminist whining about alleged reverse discrimination.

Warren Farrell's rebellion against women's attempts at social and economic freedom is frighteningly similar to that of white supremacists against minorities. He dismisses as irrelevant crimes of sexual harassment, rape and economic injustice committed against women.

This only proves that a man can cry, eat quiche, arrange flowers, yet still be a bigot. Betty Friedan is right to ignore Farrell.

JENNIFER RAVEN

Marina del Rey

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So Warren Farrell, the male feminist camp follower, is announcing to the world that he's no longer a feminist. When is he going to announce that he never was? Looks like he's been crying and hugging his way to the bank for the past 20 years.

SUE ROTH

Los Angeles

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Thank you, Warren Farrell, for balancing the scales. Your "Myth of Male Power" is a most accurate portrayal of how the American man has become the favorite whipping boy for everyone (not just the feminist extremists) and has stupidly turned the other cheek.

Farrell's book should be mandatory reading for everyone interested in improving human relations and building bridges instead of bigger fences.

DON GARDE

Malibu

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So feminists are opportunists and men are unappreciated saviors, huh? This from Warren Farrell, a man who raped the women's movement and then co-opted its language to write a book that casts men as society's "real victims." Naturally, in his simplistic terms, this relegates women to the role of victimizer.

One would think after spending time on both sides of the fence, he would see that all of us are victimized to some extent when we are subjected to one immutable standard--a standard that feminists seek to eradicate. We live in a system that defines us by gender, race, religion and sexual orientation, placing limits on our rights, our freedom and our choices.

That system, Mr. Farrell, was created by men. If men truly feel victimized by it, then why do they fight so hard to maintain it?

JANE MARSTON-HARTWELL

Huntington Beach

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Dear Warren, Get a grip. Get a life. Get your own issues and stop using women's lives and women's experiences as the basis for your 70-hour work weeks. Thank you.

LOIS J. WUNDERLEY

Escondido

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I was surprised to see Warren Farrell and his book "The Myth of Male Power" getting any press from a strongly feminist publication like The Times.

It seems our feminist media have doomed men to a position of moral inferiority whenever debating inter-gender relationships.

Farrell is right. When women whine, it's called righteous indignation. When men whine, it's because they are threatened, insecure, weak. It seems hypocrisy is alive and well in the women's movement, but what do I know, I'm only a man.

TIMOTHY RAINEY

Huntington Beach

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Granted, many men in our society are victims. After long years of working hard to support their families, they're dumped. Why? They're boring. Others undergo endless nagging and put-downs.

Women have been victimized, some by mental, physical or sexual abuse, others by being left for some sweet young thing just when the family's financial situation was looking rosy and the kids getting more independent.

Both sexes have suffered in the ensuing divorces, the women financially, the men by losing contact with their children.

The group that suffers far more (than men or women) from marital breakup lacks the power to change the laws: The children.

PATRICIA FREY

Santa Barbara

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There are many good men who value feminine qualities and want to be similarly valued. It is not a question of being a victor in gender warfare. No one wins that contest.

That is why I deplore Warren Farrell's message. If he was unhappy with the women's movement, take it up with them. Instead he is shooting volleys at all women.

LORRAINE GARAFALO

Huntington Beach

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