Downey's California:
--Holiday thought: Better to have Jack Frost nipping at your nose than Dennis Hopper sniffing at your shoes.
--Were I Robert Duvall, I would have told my agent: "No way. Wrestling Mariel Hemingway, maybe."
--Two Wisconsin people in town for the Rose Bowl heard that Glenn Close was doing "Sunset Boulevard." They walked the street for three days and never saw her once.
--New script I'm writing based on Mario Lemieux's underwear: "The Penguin Brief."
--No, no, no, no, no. Fox wants John Madden. Fox wants Pat Summerall. Fox wants Terry Bradshaw. I thought Fox wanted to give us a reason to change the channel. Turns out all Fox wants to give us is a remote to change the channel.
--I can already hear their ads: "You're watching 'The NFL Today on CBS on Fox.' "
--I would hire Chick Hearn, too, just so Variety's headline could read: "CHICK IN FOX HOUSE."
--Well, that sale of KMPC all-sports radio will be finalized any year now--1995, 1996, latest.
--The last time I saw uniforms uglier than the ones the Milwaukee Bucks are wearing, monkeys were flying toward Oz.
--Watching the Bucks wear purple is like watching the Lakers wear white.
--Dallas has a clean shot at the record for consecutive seasons (two) in which the NFL team posts more victories than the NBA team.
--You watch, Troy Aikman will blow the whole $50 million on Lorrie Morgan albums.
--Next time the Clippers play the Warriors in Oakland, call your bookie. Take the Clippers and the 47 points against the spread.
--Ron Harper said the Clippers play better on the road. I've seen squirrels play better on the road.
--Don't fault Donald Sterling and Bruce McNall if they phone Georgia Frontiere and say: "Wait. We're going to Baltimore with you!"
--Been following the Kings' hockey games on TV? Every \o7 one \f7 of them must have stopped using illegal sticks.
--Are switchblades permitted at a Shark-Jet game?
--CNN showed a "Play of the Day" in which a high school basketball player runs off the court, into a washroom, out another door and back onto the court to make a basket. Well, it's official. \o7 Now I have seen it all.\f7
--Lenny Dykstra's new deal with the Phillies includes an unusual disaster clause in case a wad of chewing tobacco swallows \o7 him.\f7
--You know what I'd really like next Christmas? An Earl Anthony-autographed ball.
--I got excited about this new TV program, "Viper," until I found out it wasn't about a sports agent.
--Still angry at Fox, CBS might not show Jim Everett's jersey on TV in Los Angeles any more because his number is 11.
--The only thing Fox won't show is World Cup soccer games involving Colombia.
--Italy, Ireland and Mexico were put in the same World Cup bracket. I don't know how the games will be, but the refreshment stands should be great.
