She left immediately for Seattle and went directly to the house, where she was joined by relatives, friends and fellow musicians, including Kim Deal of the Breeders and members of her own band.
It was at the home on Sunday morning that Love taped the message that was played to fans at the public memorial that evening--the message that contained excerpts from the suicide note left by her husband.
The message spoke of Cobain's loss of enthusiasm for life and for music. But it will still be hard for Nirvana fans to understand the severity of the depression that pushed Cobain to take his life--just as it is hard now for his family and friends to understand why all their efforts weren't enough to save him.
But the degree of Cobain's pain is evident in something he said in "Come as You Are: The Story of Nirvana," a recent biography of the band by Michael Azerrad.
While he said he kept the guns for protection, he called them evil things.
"I shot a gun with (a friend) about a year ago," he recalled. "We went down to Aberdeen and went out in the woods and shot this gun and it was just such a reminder of how brutal they are, how much damage they can do to a person."
To have put a shotgun to his head while having the visual picture of such damage suggests a pain far greater than any anger and alienation even his family grasped.
