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Pint-Sized Punch Lines

July 23, 1998

What did the car say when it finished the race? "I need a brake." (Tommy Griego, 8, Los Angeles, St. Alphonsus School)

* Why didn't the lake like the pond? It thought the pond was very shallow. (Alison Thierbach, 10, Riverside, Washington Elementary)

* Who does a duck see when he is sick? A quack doctor. (Erika Dahlberg, 10, Burbank, Thomas Edison School)

* Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Foster Farms was on the other side. (Kristen Dannielle Evans, 11, Alta Loma, Floyd M. Stork Elementary)

* Where was the bear when the lights went off? In the dark. (Leann Nadine Lopez, 11, Baldwin Park, Edgewood Middle School)

* What do you call petroleum jelly that can sing? Vaseline Dion. (Sarah Kislak, 6, Agoura Hills, Yerba Buena Elementary)

* KIDS, GOT A JOKE? Send it to Pint-Sized Punch Lines by fax, (213) 237-0732, or mail, Life & Style, Los Angeles Times, Times Mirror Square, Los Angeles, CA 90053. Print (or type) your full name, age, hometown and school. Please note that we try to avoid jokes we've published before. And please be patient.

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