The Bland Hall of Fame celebrates boring and dull Americans from all walks of life. Its mission, quite simply, is to treat with compassion the legions who suffer from this country's only unpardonable sin: being boring.
How many TV specials, documentaries or major motion pictures have been produced about bland people? Right, there haven't been any. What are we so afraid of? Couldn't we all learn from the Bland Hall of Fame's motto: "Bland is as bland does"?
Some recent inductees to the hall of fame for lifetime achievement:
* Sgt. Joe Friday: Most boring gumshoe who ever walked a beat. Most crooks surrendered and begged for solitary after a few minutes with Joe.
* Michael Dukakis: He tried to blow us away with that famous tank ride. Mike, you can run, but you can't hide from your own flat personality.