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The Inside Track | Morning Briefing

Hasn't This Man Ever Been to a Clipper Game?

January 31, 1999|MAL FLORENCE

The Atlanta Falcons will be wearing their black uniforms today in the Super Bowl. It was an easy decision, considering the Falcons were 8-0 while attired in black this season.

Samuelle Easton, president of a New York color psychology firm, said the Falcons may have made a mistake.

"While the black may make them appear more formidable, rough and tough, it'll also make them top heavy," Easton said.

The Broncos will be attired in white jerseys and were 6-2 while wearing them. Nonetheless, Easton said the white jerseys make them seem like the good guys and "Good guys just won't lose."

Since when?

Trivia time: Which is the only Super Bowl game that was tied at halftime?

Forgotten fullback: Bob Ryan in the Boston Globe: "If you're old enough, you remember when fullback was a ballcarrying position.

"Nowadays, fullback is football's answer to a witness protection program. If you crave anonymity, ask the coach to make you a fullback. Guards get more ink.

" 'I can't even find my name in the paper,' shrugs Denver fullback Howard Griffith. " 'So I stopped buying them.' "

Give it to him: From comedy writer Alan Ray: "The Miami Heat will try to sign Dennis Rodman. Some of his demands are a bit unrealistic. He wants his own cross-dressing room."

More Rodman: "Would [Rodman] comply with the team rules set down by Coach Pat Riley?" asks Jay Mariotti of the Chicago Sun-Times. "There's a better chance of Dan Reeves and Mike Shanahan sharing a hot fudge sundae than Rodman behaving for a dictator."

Backwoods grammar: Woody Paige in the Denver Post: "The toothbrush was invented in Georgia. If it had been invented anywhere else, it would have been called a teethbrush."

Paige on Miami: "The state bird is the mosquito, and the state animal is the roach. You [visitors] will be introduced often to both."

Miami lice: Dick Kreck of the Denver Post in a column published in the Miami Herald:

"True fact: Name another city that has a voodoo squad--city workers assigned to clean up dolls, roosters, dead goats and other objects placed in front of the courthouse to ward off stiff sentences."

No free speech: John Madden charges $50,000 to $70,000 to address sales personnel, the most expensive sports-related speaker around, according to the February issue of P.O.V. Magazine.

Evander Holyfield ranks No. 2 at $50,000-$65,000, followed by Pat Riley at $50,000-$60,000.

Trivia answer: San Francisco and Cincinnati were tied, 3-3, in 1989.

And finally: Bernie Lincicome in the Chicago Tribune:

"Fashionable opinion at this Super Bowl is that Chris Chandler is a better quarterback than John Elway, though a similar consensus does not exist for a used Pontiac being better than a used Ferrari or asparagus being a better appetizer than stone crab."

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