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Laugh Lines

May 13, 1999

Hold Your Fire: President Clinton apologized again to the Chinese. "He's also given them a gift certificate for future nuclear secrets." (David Letterman)

Hold Your Fire II: "This is the most apologizing Clinton's ever done without first being confronted with DNA evidence." (Jay Leno)

Poetry Slam: The White House invited executives, experts and teens to a summit on youth violence. "Critics feared the summit would be an empty gesture, or even worse, that the teenagers would be asked to share their poetry." (Jon Stewart)

Say Good Night: After 60 years in broadcasting, Hugh Downs announced he is leaving "20/20." "He's at that awkward age: too old for '20/20' and too young to be on '60 Minutes.' " (Conan O'Brien)

In the Arena: The Los Angeles Lakers beat the Houston Rockets in the first round of NBA playoffs, with Robert Horry in for Dennis Rodman. "Everyone agrees Horry has some high heels to fill." (Argus Hamilton)

High Point: A new museum in Washington, D.C., is devoted to drugs. "In fact, right now there's an amazing Robert Downey Jr. exhibit showing in the Keith Richards wing." (Alex Kaseberg)

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