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Laugh Lines

August 28, 2000

Lip Action: Analysts "say that Al Gore's acceptance speech . . . hit a home run. . . . The way he kissed Tipper--halfway to third base right there. . . . Gore is doing so well now that even [George W.] Bush said he is considering making out with Tipper." (Jay Leno)

Out-of-Sight Ratings: "The ratings for 'Live With Regis' are up about 27% from a year ago, when Kathie Lee Gifford was still on the show. Ratings could go even higher because producers have decided to change the name of the show to 'Live Without Kathie Lee.' " (Conan O'Brien)

Thinking It Over: "George W. Bush says he may have to rethink his tax cut plan. Originally, the plan called for a $1.3-trillion cut in taxes, spread out over a 10-year period. . . . [But] Bush says now that someone has shown him how many zeros there are in a trillion, he may have to rethink the strategy." (Ira Lawson)

Losing Her Shirt: In Lake Placid, New York, "a young woman asked [President Clinton] to autograph her shirt and after Clinton signed it, she pulled off her shirt. . . . They are giving her a hard time because of the Secret Service. But I can understand why she took her shirt off. With Clinton's track record, she probably didn't want to risk getting it all stained." (Leno)

Got a joke? Send it to Laugh Lines by fax, (213) 237-0732, or mail, Southern California Living, Los Angeles Times, 202 W. 1st St., Los Angeles, 90012.

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