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'Grinch's' Message Is Clear: There's Green Enough for Sharing

December 18, 2000|DARA MONAHAN

Well, the numbers are in, and the winner's a cinch

The holiday box office champ is "The Grinch"

Though it's not even Christmas, they've made proclamations

"The Grinch" grinched the Rugrats, and those darling Dalmatians

From his whimsy with drawing to his magic with rhyme

Dr. Seuss is my favorite scribe of all time

To say I'm a Seussophile's putting it mildly

Since knee-high to a Who, I have loved his work wildly

His original "Grinch" tale was simple, indeed

Hearth, home and friendship are all that we need

The moral of the yuletide tale is commendable

As the Grinch realizes mere things are expendable

Yet this is a paradox if ever I've seen one

There's a mountain of merchandise starring the Mean One

Yes, the film of this story--with "simple pleasures" the gist

Is now making money hand over fist!

Sure, we all do a project with profit in mind

But who could have predicted big bucks of this kind?

Now please don't think me as snide or sardonic

But a "profitable parable" seems oxymoronic

Ron Howard and Brian Grazer are good-natured blokes

(Even spoofing themselves on "The Simpsons" with jokes)

And I know that Imagine's a charitable bunch

So I'm writing to share my holiday hunch

Start a new Grinch Foundation--why, it all seems so clear!

Make the cynics in Tinseltown stand up and cheer

And think of how wonderfully well this surprise'll

Honor the memory of Theodor Geisel

C'mon--who would miss a couple of million

With projected "Grinch" profits a cool quarter-billion?

(I'm not even counting the bucks they'll rake in

From every "Grinch" greeting card, T-shirt and pin)

Every year Universal could have its own bash

To donate to needy folks much-needed cash

You could support different charities that are in the red

(I can think of 100 off the top of my head)

This way the Grinch's lesson would be brought into focus

That'd be a real "special effect"--not just screen hocus-pocus

Imagine a film with a legacy of this sort

Mssrs. Howard and Grazer, the ball's in your court . . .


Dara Monahan is a freelance writer whose last assignment was an episode of "Cousin Skeeter" for Nickelodeon. She lives in Studio City.

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