Jesus also confided in cousin Rolando Mireles, who lives in Houston.
"He said it was a mistake to join," Mireles says.
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Radical Turn For A Rebel
GREEN CARD MARINES / RADICAL TURN FOR A REBEL
The war in Iraq drew attention to the growing number of noncitizens serving in the U.S. military -- about 37,000. Seven of the 10 killed were from California. Most were Latino. This is the last of four portraits of Green Card Marines who gave their lives.
For The Record
Los Angeles Times Friday May 30, 2003 Home Edition Main News Part A Page 2 National Desk 1 inches; 38 words Type of Material: Correction
Green card Marines -- A photo caption accompanying an article on Marine Lance Cpl. Jesus A. Gonzalez in Wednesday's California section incorrectly stated that Marines were standing at attention at Gonzalez's grave. They were standing at parade rest.
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Ivonne said Jesus became more frustrated and at times would drink heavily.
Leon said that he and Jesus were once caught driving onto the base when they were drunk. As a result, Jesus was restricted to quarters when Ivonne was nine months pregnant. Like his own father in Mexico, he was not there to see the birth of his baby.
His dissatisfaction continued to build, Ivonne said, and he was looking forward to getting out of the Marines when his term was scheduled to end in April. But as talk of war heated up, Jesus became angry when he learned his enlistment was being extended a year.
"He didn't want to go," his wife said. "He was scared.... He didn't want to die."
Trying to Understand
Jesus' body was brought back to the Coachella Valley, and he was buried a few miles west of the weapons factory where he once marched in protest. His family and friends revisit their memories now, trying to understand Jesus' transformation from social activist to college student to Marine tank fighter.
His wife, Ivonne, sits on the brown shag carpet in the living room of her Escondido apartment and sorts through the letters Jesus mailed during his last days. They'd had trouble in their short time together, and in one letter Jesus wrote that he would understand if she decided to leave him.
In another letter, he said: "Everything is going to be good in a few months. And I am going to come home to the family that I most love and miss.... Don't give up on me. We are barely starting as a married couple."
Other articles from this series are available online at www.latimes.com/marines.
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