AARP's revamped magazine attempts hip without the replacement

Washington, D.C. — I dunno why you love me baby, I dunno why you care

I'm losin' my memory, I'm losin' my hair

I lost my car keys around here somewhere

I'm part of the furniture, I'm stuck to that chair

-- "Sox 'n' Sandals," recorded at age 50 by Graham Parker

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The editor in chief of AARP's magazine now bans the use of "senior citizen" because he considers it a "dead" term. One recent issue's cover proclaimed that "Sixty is the new thirty." Another trumpeted a survey of middle-aged singles that found a third of the women who dated preferred younger men. The March/April cover teases with a promo crying: "Help! My Husband Loves Porn."

These are scenes from a high-stakes demographic drama in which the preeminent magazine for seniors puts on a younger face to seduce the aging baby-boom generation -- people ages 40 through 58, some of whom cringe at the thought of ever joining AARP, its wide-ranging discounts be damned.

In this marketing battle, o-l-d has been replaced by s-e-x. Traditional notions of accommodating physical frailty have been replaced by tales of relentless vigor. And three editions -- one for members in their 50s, another for those in their 60s and one for people 70 and older -- are published to navigate generational chasms.

If you're a 50-ish AARP member, you might find this surprisingly seductive, particularly because the magazine is usually well written and knowingly sprinkled with pop-culture asides. (Like: "Seinfeld is 50. Not that there's anything wrong with that.") If you're 60 or older, like 70% of AARP's 35 million members, you might be feeling a bit left out, shoved aside by the kids.

This is the fifth year of AARP's trial-and-error campaign to remake its bimonthly membership magazine into a hip lifestyle journal. The organization, which 20 years ago lowered the membership age from 55 to 50, stopped calling itself the American Assn. of Retired Persons in 1999 in favor of initials , because the "R word" scared many boomers.

Time for a change