Marriage License Denied, Women Start Legal Action
Although Carmen and Dorothy Apodoca would like to marry with the government's blessing, going to San Francisco over the weekend never crossed their minds.
The Garden Grove couple think a government-sanctioned union would be only temporary because a court hearing today could nullify the more than 2,400 unions granted since Thursday.
"What's happening in San Francisco is not legal," said Dorothy Apodoca, 50. "They're just pacifying the people and can yank the license at any time."
The couple filed a claim against Orange County seeking $25 million in damages for violating their civil rights and inflicting emotional distress after the county clerk's office denied their marriage license application Jan. 7.
Due to the Presidents Day holiday, officials from the clerk's office could not be reached for comment. In an interview before he opened the Old County Courthouse in Santa Ana for heterosexual couples to marry Saturday, Valentine's Day, Orange County Clerk-Recorder Tom Daly said he would abide by state law and deny licenses to same-sex partners until overturned by the Supreme Court.
Marriage between gay couples is an issue of equality, the Apodocas say, not of sexuality.
"As soon as people can separate those two things, we'll be in a better place," said Carmen Apodoca, 52.
"The Constitution says we're equal, so no one out there has the right to dictate what we can do with our lives."
Fighting for the permanent right to marry, rather than opting for what might be a fleeting act by the mayor of San Francisco, shows that their crusade isn't just for themselves, the couple say. A legal wedding won't change how they feel about each other, but it will provide them the security that their heterosexual counterparts have.
"If he passes away, his wife automatically gets the house and Social Security," Dorothy Apodoca said.
"I want to have those same rights, to know that if anything should happen to me, my family would be secure."
The couple met eight years ago when both were working in San Jose. Dorothy has adopted Carmen's two daughters, ages 13 and 14, as a stepmother, and continues to work while her partner stays at home with the children. All have taken Dorothy's last name.
The women are active in their daughters' schools, working with the Parent Teacher Assns. and School Site Council. The couple and their daughters are involved in their church and say their pastor is eager to marry them as soon as it's legal.
