Here are my suggestions after Game 3 of the NBA Finals:
Gary Payton, retire immediately.
Phil Jackson, try cloning some of Larry Brown's coaching tactics and then retire after the Finals.
Shaq, get mad and grow up and be the true Laker leader.
Kobe, distribute the ball in the triangle set and look for Shaquille, pleeeeeez!
Karl, just stand out there and knock down Rasheed Wallace as long as you can.
Rancho Palos Verdes
No rebounds, no rings. I thought we learned that lesson from Bird, McHale and Parish 20 years ago.
I'm sure the American Medical Assn. is grateful to the Lakers for the increase in acid reflux disease that their poor play is giving the fans from all over the country.
If only Karl Malone had convinced John Stockton to come "ring chasing" instead of Gary Payton!
Three things that are sure to happen in Southern California, should the Lakers wind up losing to the Pistons.
1. Fewer Laker car flags flying.
2. More people wearing Piston gear.
3. Laker fans blaming the loss to Detroit on either Karl Malone's gimpy knee and/or the officiating, without giving any credit to the Pistons.
Maybe it is just me, but I believe I can hear Doc Rivers pumping his fist at every Laker turnover or poor effort. I can't believe that Red brainwashed him so fast. I hope that nobody throws him a towel or he might break into his M.L. Carr routine.
The Flakers are going to cause me to lose my sobriety. They only play hard when absolutely necessary and lack a real leader like Bill Russell or Magic Johnson.
If I were the owner I would let every player go whose contract is up this year and then trade Shaq to the Clippers for a draft pick. Then, just to be fair to the fans, I would cut all the ticket prices by 75%.
People are saying that if Larry Brown coaches the Pistons to an NBA title, it will be a miracle. They forget he coached the Clippers into the playoffs twice. Now that's a miracle.