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Men, women ... and sex

September 09, 2004

Laura Shin hits the key issues in the dating community ("Hands Off, Pal O' Mine!" Sept. 2). The issue of women having friendships with men really hits home as I have many women friends. Contrary to popular belief, we don't always want to sleep with our girl friends. I have always had good-looking girl friends; it has helped in my dating and relationship-building. But I have to let Shin know, that most women ask for these problems.

How many times has she gone out with her guy friend and he paid for everything? How many times has she flirted with him? How many times has she taken care to repay that friendship? How many times has she even offered?

Too many women take advantage of these friendships and then complain that when they meet someone, that maybe "we should be friends first before we get serious."

If you are going to be a friend, be a friend. Not a date looking for an opportunity to meet someone else.

If Shin doesn't want to give the impression that she is available to "date" her friend, be clearer. Men and women are stupid. Nobody knows what the other is thinking. If I begin to "like" my friend, I tell her and go from there.

Eddie Martinez



If you've ever seen the speed and enthusiasm with which a male dog has sex you will understand why the comparison is made with guys. It takes a lifetime of conditioning to groom away this cheerful impulse. In any man-woman association, where the woman is even a little bit attractive, there exists that elephant in the living room that no dude can ignore.

Jim Sadtler

Hacienda Heights

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