Occasionally, Dennis Martin used to question his decision to become a librarian.
Martin never suffered a full blown crisis of faith: He loved his job. But nearing retirement, the 34-year employee of the Los Angeles County library system could not help taking stock.
"I often asked myself, 'Is what I'm doing helpful? Is what I'm doing meaningful?' " he said.
In December, Martin got an answer. He was named a winner of a prestigious librarian award. The honor surprised Martin, 65, not only because it was nationwide but also because he was nominated by a once-homeless woman who had hardly offered him a kind word.
Martin got the award because of Laura Bell.
After 25 years at the Hawthorne Library, Martin was transferred to the Gardena Mayme Dear Library last year, where he was soon introduced to one of its most frequent patrons: Bell.
She needed help, and not in finding a book or magazine. If she hadn't already hit rock bottom, she didn't have far to go.
Arthritis had knotted her once nimble fingers, making it impossible to work as a typist. Unemployment ate away her bank account and fed her desperation.
She came to the library to use the computers to draw up resumes and research ways to get disability payments. She sought to end a slide that eventually would leave her homeless and hungry.
But Bell, in her 50s, was no gentle soul seeking the kindness of strangers. She was hurt, angry and distrustful. She felt let down by social welfare agencies and disappointed in family and friends.
And she unleashed this bitterness on the library staff -- sometimes with withering sarcasm, other times with explosive tantrums or through clenched teeth, with eyes fighting tears.
"She was very difficult to work with," said Supervising Librarian Tina Carwile.
In walked Martin. "She had depleted her welcome," he said. "She seemed very critical of the computers and the staff. They wondered how long I could be nice to her. I thought she was very demanding, cranky and intrusive. But I could see she was a very bright person who was in a part of her life where people were abandoning her."
They worked together for months. With the other librarians, Martin helped Bell hunt down information on social services, guiding her through the byzantine process of applying for disability benefits.
"For many months I didn't get any results," Martin said.
