Jobs: Establishing the value of your work can be especially tricky. Websites such as Salary.com can provide a glimpse of what similar positions pay. You also can look at job postings and talk to people who work in similar jobs at the company you want to work for and its competitors. That's likely to provide a fairly accurate salary range.
But when negotiating you have to be realistic about supply and demand, said Bill Coleman, senior vice president of Salary.com.
"It comes down to an issue of leverage," he said. "When there are more openings than candidates, the candidates win. When there are more candidates than openings, the companies win."
During the late '90s, for example, salary surveys couldn't keep up with reality because there was such heavy demand for tech-savvy people that companies would at times pay $20,000, $30,000 or even $40,000 more than the norm for a candidate with the right skills. A few years later, the trend was reversed and a job that would normally pay $50,000 could often be filled by someone happy to earn $45,000.
Know your priorities.
Negotiations often have many moving parts. Think through what terms might be crucial to you and look at those when offers are relatively similar -- or when you think you can't do better with the bottom line, Dilbeck's Vernon advises.
For instance, a buyer who is willing to close a home purchase quickly -- or delay because that suits the seller's needs -- can rise above other buyers offering a similar price.
A manager may be constrained by office norms or policy from offering you the salary you want but may be able to offer you a flexible schedule or extra vacation time, Coleman said.
"There are a lot of things you could be negotiating for other than the base pay," he said. "You can negotiate for a bonus, for extra time off, for a flexible schedule."
When a negotiation hits a wall -- the employer says it can't go any higher on salary -- it's a great time to bring up these other issues that might make you close the deal.
"Sometimes people get so caught up in the negotiating that they forget what the point is -- that's having a career and a life that you like," he said. "It's not just about money."
Don't get cocky.
Even after you complete a deal, you might want to do some post-mortem second-guessing, Larrick said. The reason: Most people walk away believing they were the winner when they weren't. If there's no reality check, they're likely to repeat their mistakes. Few people do it because no one wants to admit they were wrong. But you would be wise to consider whether the deal you got was a good one, Larrick said.
"The more confident you are that you walked away a winner, the more likely you are to handle your next negotiation like your last," he said. "Don't be smug."
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