"You have to have a good sense of yourself in your own convictions," Scholer replied, "so that in any relationship, you never feel threatened."
Scholer explained how he handled a professor at Dallas Theological Seminary who wrote a "particularly critical" piece about him.
When Scholer saw him, he threw his arms around his critic and said, 'Hey, brother, how is it going? I don't like what you wrote, but that's OK.' " Then they laughed.
The Rev. Victor Olivas, pastor of Community Baptist Church of East Los Angeles, took Scholer's course on women in ministry in the early 1990s.
"That really helped me deal with women in the church," he said, adding that he has welcomed them into leadership roles in his congregation. "Nowadays," he added, "it helps me with my wife."
Olivas went to the pastors conference, he said, to thank his former professor publicly. "I pray for him," Olivas said. "I thank God for him. He is a pastor's pastor."
Fourteen days after the conference, Scholer sent another e-mail:
"My CEA count has gone up again; Last month it was 7.7; now it is 8.4."
He reported that he had lost four more pounds. Though still a big man, he's lost more than 50 pounds in the last year, and his jackets hang loose on his frame.
"As always, I appreciate your prayers, care and love. I admit to having a low-level of anxiety at this time. I will keep you posted. Love, David."
THERE was no road-to-Damascus moment, no sudden revelation. But over time Scholer came to realize that one of "the greatest lessons" from living with cancer is the value of memory.
Scholer says he revels in remembering the wonderful things he has been given -- his family, friends and all the places he has visited and the people he has met -- and how much joy that has brought to his life.
That doesn't mean that he dwells in the past but, in remembering, he "celebrates with gratitude what has been," he said.
And there is still the chance to make yet more memories, which explains the hymn sings, the Rose Bowl, the cruise to Hawaii, the loyal correspondence, the teaching, the conference lecture.
In a way, it all leads back to the verse from Thessalonians \o7-- Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances.\f7
All circumstances. It's the portion he had long resisted.
"But I have now learned that I \o7should\f7 and I \o7can,"\f7 he said\o7.
\f7On May 29, Scholer sent out another e-mail:
"Today I was at the cancer center for my regular treatment and for a meeting with my oncologist to go over the results of Friday's test. He pronounced the results 'very good.' The smallest of my cancer growths in my lungs did not show up. The two larger ones (one in each lung) have not grown. There are no evidences of new cancer growths anywhere.
"Jeannette and I are overwhelmed with joy and gratitude. Thank you for your care and many, many prayers."
"This is great news to have 19 days before Abby and Nick's wedding!" he added. "Blessings and love, David."
connie.kang@latimes.com
