Looks like that wacky Golden Baseball League -- you know, home of the Long Beach Armada of Los Angeles of California of the United States of North America Including Barrow, Alaska -- is still at it.
After the public-address announcer for the Reno Silver Sox was ejected for cueing up a smart-aleck sound effect last week, Kevin Outcalt, the league commissioner, ordered him to spend the first inning of the next game as a third base umpire.
Announcer Mike Murray's offense? He greeted a close call with a Bob Uecker sound bite from the movie "Major League":
\o7Personally, I think we got hosed on that call.\f7
The San Diego Padres' Trevor Hoffman already owns the all-time saves record and Wednesday became the first pitcher to record 500 saves.
At what position was he originally drafted, and by which team?
Bonus points for the correct round.
Up with the OC
Some of us still can't wrap our minds around it.
Angels, 2002 World Series champions.
Ducks, 2007 Stanley Cup champions.
It hasn't always been this way around Orange County. Or to put it another way, it always hasn't been this way.
"For a very long time, the Angels and Ducks came together as a Misery Loves Company performance-art troupe," writes The Times' "Day in L.A." blogger, Christine Daniels. "The Ducks were responsible for depressing OC fans from October through April, which was quite handy, considering that the Angels began their seasons in April and never played during October."
An NBC release touts an upcoming reality show called "Age of Love," in which seven women in their 40s, nicknamed the Cougars, vie with six women in their 20s, nicknamed the Kittens, for the affection of Australian tennis star Mark Philippoussis.
Among the Cougars is 48-year-old "Jennifer," whose occupation is listed as "executive assistant for the owner of the Los Angeles Lakers."
Lakers spokesman John Black was uncertain whether Jerry Buss has an assistant named Jennifer, saying, "Maybe it's one of the minority owners. I can't think of any Jennifer."
Right. After that traffic stop in Carlsbad, we had Buss pegged for a Kitten guy anyway.
What's the saying, "Success has a thousand fathers?"
A release landed in our in-box reading, "KeepBillyDonovan.com Announces Success to Keep Billy Donovan as the Florida Gators Basketball Coach. Billy Donovan says he will sign long-term extension, stay in Gainesville, 'forever.' "
T-shirts, not surprisingly, are available, but we don't think that's how Florida is going to pay Donovan $3.5 million a year.
The Blackwell list, gridiron version
College football's worst uniforms have been selected by SportsIllustrated.com. Neither USC nor UCLA, with their traditional garb, made the list.
Not surprisingly, Oregon's Gatorade-like Nike uniforms were No. 1. But there was an upstart at No. 2 -- Wyoming, with its yellow-and-brown, old-time Padres color scheme.
One classic program took a hit: Notre Dame's green jerseys made it at No. 9.
Hoffman was drafted by the Cincinnati Reds as a shortstop in the 11th round in 1989 after playing at Anaheim Savanna High, Cypress College and Arizona.
He was in his second professional season, batting .212 with the Class-A Charleston Wheelers, when the Reds approached him about trying something else.
The next season, less than 10 innings into Hoffman's pitching career with the Cedar Rapids Reds, minor league manager Frank Funk had at least an inkling of what was ahead.
"My view of him is he's going to be a very dominant closer for a major league team," Funk told The Times in 1991.
And finally ...
Former Dodgers pitcher Rick Rhoden, golfing for the $2-million first-place check in the Ultimate Game at Wynn Las Vegas, after he shot a nine-over-par 79 in the first round:
"Some days you feel like a pigeon and some days you feel like a statue. Today I felt like the statue."