Holy cow! Israel makes its pitch
It's an old joke, so indulge us with a chuckle, or a groan. But do you know where to find baseball in the Bible?
Why, in the very first sentence: In the big inning
Baseball in the Holy Land? No joke, not as of today. This is Opening Day for the Israel Baseball League, the first professional serving of bats and balls in the land of milk and honey.
The Israeli sports scene leans to Europe, to soccer and basketball. Maccabi Tel Aviv, the country's foremost basketball club, is a five-time European champion. When the World Cup starts, Israel stops.
The Americans are not deterred, at least not the ones dedicating time and money to launch the league.
"Baseball in Israel would be a heartwarming and great story," Commissioner Bud Selig said. "You're going into a part of the world where baseball hasn't been popular."
Selig is on the league's advisory board. The director of baseball operations is Dan Duquette, former general manager of the Boston Red Sox and Montreal Expos. The commissioner is Daniel Kurtzer, former U.S. ambassador to Israel and Egypt.
Kurtzer often gives speeches on Middle East diplomacy and the prospects for peace, and audiences applaud politely. Then he mentions he's running a new baseball league, and the crowd goes nuts.
"It's now a family joke: It's about time I'm doing something worthwhile with my life," Kurtzer said.
This is a minor league operation, and we mean that kindly. The league is modeled on the minor leagues: Give fans a good time at a good price, and they'll come back, even if their team loses, even if they don't know who the players are.
The league won't play on Friday night or Saturday, in deference to the Jewish Sabbath, and the ballpark food will be strictly kosher. Hot dogs will be sold, of course, but a sausage race probably would be in bad taste.
Israeli fans nonetheless will be deluged with a menu of American promotions -- fireworks nights, singles nights, bobblehead dolls, "Israeli Idol" singing contests, kids running the bases after the game, fans stuffed into giant sumo costumes wrestling on the field between innings.
And, because Israelis are used to soccer and basketball contests that end in two hours, the league will limit games to seven innings, with ties settled by a home run derby.
