The Big Gulp

My name is David. And I drink. A lot. Every day. In fact, the first thing I do when I stumble out of bed is pour myself a tall one. I usually finish it while standing at the dining room table looking at the sports headlines. Then I plop a second one next to the computer in my home office while I check my e-mail. By noon I've had, what, three or four? Who's keeping track? Then one, sometimes two, with lunch. And yeah, sure, I drink at dinner. Who doesn't? It's good for you. And maybe a little something after dinner. But I always stop three hours before bed. That's just a rule I have because, frankly, I don't want to tinkle all night. This has been my routine for years now. Six, seven, maybe eight glasses of water a day. From the tap. Actually, from the door dispenser of our refrigerator because it's chilled. Good stuff. Which is why when some ridiculously attentive waitress starts off our little customer/server chat by asking if I'd prefer still or sparkling water, I say, "Uhmmm . . . tap?" She maintains that extravagant smile on her face, but her eyes give her away. They scream: Don't you know that stuff can kill you?

Which is why I was pleased to hear a story on National Public Radio recently saying that Alice Waters--yes, that Alice Waters--was no longer going to offer bottled water at Berkeley's Chez Panisse. After twisting the caps off 24,000 bottles of Italian mineral water every year for 30-plus years, she was over it. From here on out, her customers could drink filtered tap water or just order more wine. Whatever.

Alice, I'm with you all the way. I will defend you from numbnuts such as JamesM, who ranted on a Zagat blog that he will no longer grace Chez Panisse with his presence. "I want bottled water and won't settle for less. I would like to remind people that both glass (which I prefer) and plastic bottles are recyclable."

Jimmy, Jimmy, Jimmy. Would it shock you to know that Bay Area tap water is pretty good? And if you get off your high horse long enough to come south, you'll find Los Angeles water is even better. In fact, it's as good or better than many types of bottled water. Case in point: The National Resources Defense Council tested more than 100 brands of bottled water and found that a third of them "contain significant contamination (i.e., levels of chemical or bacterial contaminants exceeding those allowed under a state or industry standard or guideline) in at least one test." You like your Yosemite brand water, Jimmy? It's drawn from Highland Park. How about some of that yummy Aquafina, the top-selling bottled water in the U.S.? It's taken from municipal taps in places such as Fresno and Detroit. Is that what you want?