Another life away from the campaign

The children peppered their father with questions. Bridget wanted to know what he would do in the face of personal attacks. In 2000, Cindy McCain's past had become campaign fodder: There were stories about her onetime addiction to Percocet and Vicodin following two back operations. She also recalled attacks that depicted her husband as being mentally unstable as a result of his time as a prisoner of war.

"It still affects me," she said. "John says, 'Oh, don't let it bother you.' . . . Well, I'm not as tough as he is, and things like that do bother me."

In addition, Cindy McCain was working to regain her health after suffering a stroke in 2004. She was focused on eating well, exercising and reducing stress -- things not usually compatible with a campaign. But with two sons in the military and a nation at war, Cindy McCain said, "It was not only something he wanted to do badly, but we needed him for the country."

One of the hardest things Cindy McCain has had to do on the trail, she said, is not talk about Jimmy and not fall apart, potentially upsetting the parents of soldiers who are serving or have been killed. "I'm a crier, I'll admit it. I just had to button up," she said.

McCain believes in her sons' military service, but declines to say whether she had doubts about the war, saying she "leaves those decisions" to her husband and "the men and women who know it better and understand it better."

Despite her reluctance to comment about policy, she got riled up in Wisconsin when she saw video of Michelle Obama, the wife of Democratic candidate Barack Obama, saying that "for the first time in my adult lifetime, I am really proud of my country." Taking the stage to introduce her husband, McCain caught the media's attention when she said with more bite than usual:

"I am proud of my country. I don't know about you, if you heard those words earlier, I am very proud of my country."

She said later: "It just spilled out of my mouth, and then I got back on the bus and I thought . . . 'Oh, I should never have opened my mouth.' "

More typically after introducing her husband, McCain stands to the side, her eyes often trained onto some sort of middle distance. She admits she's often thinking about other things.

Though she is shy and reserved compared with her loquacious spouse, campaign advisors say McCain is an avid participant in strategy sessions, speaking up when she disagrees. When the campaign was hemorrhaging money last summer, she expressed her concerns to her husband. John McCain soon parted ways with his campaign manager and his longtime strategist, a decision she said was his alone.