He's Doc -- not Mr. Popularity

I ran into him in the toothpaste aisle of the local Rite Aid last week. He was a patient of mine but I hadn't seen him in a while. I was embarrassed to admit that I couldn't remember his name. Nice guy, about my age, though he appeared to think it was still 1968 with his tie-dyed T-shirt. I had just snagged some dental floss so I could rack up three or four days of flossing before my visit with the dentist.

He took one look at me and said somewhat sheepishly, "Hey, Doc! I gotta see ya soon." (I always wonder, when they call me "Doc," if they don't remember my name either.) Then he shuffled on, and I was left to ponder what he had said. You see, he wasn't the first one, upon seeing me, to blurt out that he had to come see me soon.

I felt a little like a preacher must feel if he runs into a sporadic church attendee (Christmas and Easter services, perhaps -- on a good year). There's a little guilt about not going to church, and you tell the preacher you've resolved to come more often.

It made me wonder what it is about doctors that generates the same response.

I mean, this guy didn't have anything seriously wrong with him, as far as I could tell. His modest belly certainly spoke to the fact that he wasn't malnourished. He recognized me, so his memory was pretty good. He didn't have any jagged shards of bone sticking out from any extremities. And he certainly wasn't hemorrhaging in the toothpaste aisle.

Perhaps he figured it was time for his annual exam, everybody's favorite way to spend a couple of hours (an hour waiting, half an hour with the doctor and another half-hour to wait some more just for good measure). There was cholesterol and blood pressure to be checked, and that pesky prostate to keep tabs on. And he hadn't done it yet and he felt guilty.

It's strange to be in a business where at least several times a week I hear, "No offense, Doc, but I hope I don't see you again for a long time." And it's not just the folks who are overdue for their annual exams.

There are also the ones who announce, almost in a tone of defiance as I enter the exam room, "I don't like doctors!" I can't tell you how many times I've heard that.

I'm usually polite and take those comments in stride. However, once during a particularly busy shift in the ER, when I was a little punch-drunk from all the patients, I thought I'd have a little fun (doctors are allowed to do that from time to time). I looked at the patient and broke into a big smile and replied, "Well, it looks like you're in luck! You see, I don't like patients either, so why don't we call it quits right now?" He looked at me, confused. He wasn't expecting that.