Buying trouble

"Men tend to be much more object-driven," says Rob Weiss, executive director of the Sexual Recovery Institute in L.A., who estimates that 10% to 15% of the men and 30% to 40% of the women his clinic treats for sexual addiction are also compulsive shoppers. While women may get lost in the process of shopping -- the peace or excitement they find in gathering -- men are more often exhilarated by the hunt for a specific quarry. "Just like they're looking for a trophy spouse, they're looking for that trophy object," says Weiss. In the end, he says, "the result is the same: to fill some emotional void with objects and behavior."

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Tracking impulses

Since 2005, New York therapist April Lane Benson, author of the book "I Shop, Therefore I Am," has had participants in her group psychotherapy sessions keep journals and shopping lists that track their moods, their impulses and their household needs. When contemplating a purchase, Benson's patients are asked to record their answers to questions such as "Why am I here?," "How do I feel?," "Do I need this?," "What if I wait?," "How will I pay for it?" and "Where will I put it?"

Working through a 12-session telephone program with six women across the country, Benson sees "enormous progress." Her forthcoming book, "To Buy or Not to Buy: Why We Overshop and How to Stop," due out this December, will include a purse-sized shopping diary, a CD offering ideas and encouragement and a laminated reminder card listing the questions shoppers should ask themselves.

For most compulsive buyers, Benson believes that losing control is a chronic vulnerability. But with rigorous self-examination, she says, "I don't think it's as hard as people think" to break the spell that shopping seems to cast. "People have to understand what their triggers are, what the emotional aftermath is, what happens after the bill comes. And they have to think about what their values are and their vision in life."

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melissa.healy@latimes.com