A sister act that's tough to swallow

On paper, "The Return of Jezebel James," which premieres on Fox tonight, has so much going for it. It's the brainchild of Amy Sherman-Palladino, who gave us the still-mourned "Gilmore Girls." It explores the little-known yet highly fraught world of children's fiction that was so fun in "Elf." It stars two lovable and highly gifted actors: former indie picture "It" girl Parker Posey as Sarah Tompkins, a tightly-wound children's fiction editor, and Lauren Ambrose, who rocked so many worlds on "Six Feet Under," as her sullen and boho sister, Coco. (Coco! It has a character named Coco!) They are brought reluctantly together in one apartment, a la "The Odd Couple," a tried but true construct made modern with a surrogacy twist -- Sarah, who cannot conceive, hires Coco to have a baby for her. And, in case you need extra sprinkles on your sundae, Dianne Wiest plays their mother.

And yet.

And yet upon viewing the pilot and an early episode, it is impossible not to feel a little ripped off. Like getting the Tiffany box, with the white satin bow, and opening it to find . . . a Starbucks gift card. For 10 bucks.

There are worse gifts you could get, sure, and there are worse shows than "Jezebel James," though Fox apparently doesn't think so, having cut its initial 13-episode order and choosing to premiere it on the second deadest night of the week (Saturday isn't even a possibility anymore). The problem is that from these folks you expect a fascinating female lead, but you get instead every uptight, cellphone-clenching, relationship-avoiding, food-issue-riven working woman you've ever seen (and never met).

From the moment Posey appears on screen, yammering into a cellphone about notes her assistant has made to her about what to wear and spilling her back story to a neighbor kid collecting money for baseball uniforms -- her husband has left her, she doesn't care and no, she didn't "make him gay" -- Sarah feels as empty and echoing as her sofaless bedroom. And since she is the center of the show, this is a rather immediate problem.

Over the years, Posey has proved herself capable of radiating warmth and likability from behind myriad character tics and eccentricities, but, like the viewer, she seems at sea here. She dutifully hits all the marks -- she talks really fast because she's multitasking, is perpetually irritated because she's a perfectionist, and has a frosty self-awareness of these things because it's hip to be self-aware. As written, Sarah is more a walking Sunday style column than a recognizable human being, much less a recognizably Parker Posey being. And her irritation quickly grows, well, irritating.