It’s your wedding, so tap your inner Bridezilla

Dear Amy: I will be married in a little more than six months.

I have a cousin who for years has talked about how she would be a bridesmaid for me when I got married. She has it all planned out. She says she is going to walk down the aisle and help plan the event.

I have always cringed at this idea. Each time she brings it up, I brush it off.

For various reasons I only want my two closest friends to be my bridesmaids.

How do I break the news to my cousin?

Also, how do I explain my decision to family members who would expect her to automatically be a bridesmaid?

Bride With a Dilemma

Dear Bride: This situation calls for you to tap into your inner “Bridezilla.”

You can tell people that you aren’t having any family members as attendants and that you have chosen your two friends to stand up with you.

If your cousin expresses hurt or surprise, you can say: “I know you were interested in being a bridesmaid, but I’ve made my decision and I’m sorry if it upsets you – I hope you’ll be with us on the day. Your presence is really important to Jim and me.”

You can give your cousin an official job if you want to try to mollify her, but if she chooses to skip the wedding because of this, then she is merely illustrating all of the reasons you were nervous about choosing her in the first place.

Send questions to Amy Dickinson by e-mail to askamy@tribune.com or by mail to Ask Amy, Chicago Tribune, TT500, 435 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, IL 60611.