And congratulatory head banging seems to be very big these days, one teammate's way of saying to another: "Love ya, dude. Here, hold still while I wail on your helmet and rattle your skull."
Seems a strange thing to inflict pain on a fellow teammate. Next thing you know, they'll be stomping on each others' toes. But I can live with that. It's a momentary quirk in a very quirky game.
And don't get me wrong, TV is the best thing that ever happened to America. Without TV, football is lawn bowling; TV is chess. Without TV, we'd sit around on winter weekends watching our wives' hair thin.
I completely appreciate what the TV camera has done for football, the true 12th player. Some of the technical guys are geniuses.
By the way, know what major historical event helped inspire instant replay? The shooting of Lee Harvey Oswald by Jack Ruby, three weeks before instant replay debuted in the Army-Navy game. The oft-reviewed Oswald shooting helped pave the way to using the technology in sports. The godfather of instant replay, CBS director Tony Verna, should be in pro football's Hall of Fame.
Forty-five years later, his marvelous little idea has morphed into a carnival of replays, graphics and electronic banners smeared across our cherished New Hampshire. To me, it's like watching someone carve initials into the Lincoln Memorial.
During a recent Fox telecast, I underwent acute electronic shock, a coma-like condition triggered by flashing strobes and disco balls. And that was during the national anthem.
Instead of endless replays, how about giving us better sideline reporting -- a lost art. Slip microphones to a few of the fans or the guy pouring beer. Instead of dissecting each past play, find the story line, honor the moment.
Please. Before I wail on your helmet.
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chris.erskine@latimes.com
T.J. Simers is on vacation.
