Dear Amy: I recently discovered that my boyfriend is taking an antidepressant. I know this because I work in pharmaceuticals.
While I wasn't snooping (the prescription bottle was on his dresser in plain view), he might think I was snooping.
In the time we've been together, I've disclosed personal information to him. We've talked marriage and kids.
Isn't this information he should share with someone he considers to be a future wife?
Do I have a right to confront him, and if so, how do I handle this?
Dealing With a Dilemma
Dear Dilemma: Your first mistake is to see this as a confrontation rather than a conversation.
The good news is that if your guy has depression, he is treating it responsibly.
If this medicine is in full view, then ask him about it.
If the bottle is not in sight, tell him you saw it and have been wondering about it.
You are correct in thinking that you and your guy should talk about all sorts of personal and intimate things.
Dear Amy: My fiance and I got engaged this past summer, and since his parents learned of our engagement, they have been rude and unsupportive.
Because they do not agree with the church and religion, they will not acknowledge our upcoming wedding.
This has caused hurt and frustration, to say the least.
I have remained civil for my fiance's sake, but I have a hard time being around them and would rather have nothing to do with them.
They continually speak terribly about me and have made it clear they will not support our wedding financially or with their presence at the ceremony.
My fiance does not agree with their actions and views but is giving them every opportunity to make things right because they are his parents.
Please tell me the best way to deal with this.
Dear Frustrated: This is bound to cause both of you a lot of pain, but your fiance's parents are giving you a clear view of your future.
Look it square in the eye and make a choice. If you get married, your in-laws will continue to be rude, rejecting and controlling if you give them the opportunity.
You and your fiance should agree to establish clear and consistent boundaries with his folks. You should continue to be civil and he should be realistic about their limitations, saying, "I'm sorry you won't be at our wedding, but we accept your choice."
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