Vampires — so hot right now! Also religion. And the apocalypse. And maybe cowboys? Pull together a hodgepodge of all these elements and one ends up with something like "Priest," the big-screen adaptation of a series of graphic novels, directed by Scott Stewart.
A long war between humans and oozy, unsexy, eyeless vampires ended with the humans victorious, thanks to a league of battle-trained priests. The remaining vampires have been herded into remote prisons, while humans live in walled-off cities, rendering the warrior-priests unnecessary.
When a city-dwelling former priest (Paul Bettany) learns that his country-dwelling brother (an underused Stephen Moyer from "True Blood") and his family have been attacked, it's time to dust off the jet-cycle and head into the desert to investigate. The priest discovers that peacetime has not been as peaceful as it might have seemed and has to head off an oncoming vampire invasion.
The film is somehow a disappointing combo of too-full and oddly empty. Even with all the various parts and pieces going into its structure, it feels bare-bones — the differentiation between the dystopian future-cities and the dust-bowl hinterlands never creates the tension it should, and a fistful of crucifixes that become throwing stars is as deep as the theology gets.