Taylor Swift is firing back in her Vanity Fair cover story about all the rumors swirling around her: the boys, the songs, the houses. She even takes a moment to bash critically acclaimed Golden Globes hosts Tina Fey and Amy Poehler.
In the magazine's April issue, Swift opens up about all the tabloid fodder the 23-year-old singer has amassed and reiterates a couple things she said in the March issue of Elle. Here are a few things we learned from the preview story:
Despite popular opinion, Swift isn't boy crazy, and if you think she is, you're sexist: "For a female to write about her feelings," Swift said, "and then be portrayed as some clingy, insane, desperate girlfriend in need of making you marry her and have kids with her, I think that's taking something that potentially should be celebrated -- a woman writing about her feelings in a confessional way -- that's taking it and turning it and twisting it into something that is frankly a little sexist." By the way, Swift recently told InStyle UK that her exes are totally allowed to write songs about her, too ...
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She isn't a fictional character, and shame on us for thinking she is: "The fact that there are slide shows of a dozen guys that I either hugged on a red carpet or met for lunch or wrote a song with ... it’s just kind of ridiculous." The Ministry is guilty of such a slide show, see above. "It's why I have to avoid the tabloid part of our culture, because they turn you into a fictional character."
She has dated only two people since 2010: Conor Kennedy and One Direction's Harry Styles, both high-profile relationships and breakups that have made nearly as many headlines as her latest record-setting album.
She doesn't buy houses near her boyfriends to freak them out: "People say that about me, that I apparently buy houses near every boy I like -- that's a thing that I apparently do. If I like you I will apparently buy up the real-estate market just to freak you out so you leave me," she said.
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Katie Couric is one of her favorite people, but not Tina Fey nor Amy Poehler: The collectively praised funnywomen made a barb at Swift while hosting the Golden Globe Awards, warning Swift to stay away from presenter Michael J. Fox's son. Fox later said that he didn't want his son Sam dating her because she writes songs about her exes. Swift tweeted after the incident that she'd cleared the air with Fox but now clearly still has issues with mean girls Fey and Poehler.
"I was just sort of like, 'Oh well, you know, I can laugh at myself,' " she said. She was supposedly in the bathroom during the riff, according to E! News. "But what it ended up adding to was this whole kind of everyone jumping on the bandwagon of 'Taylor dates too much.' " As for why Swift is a fan of Couric: "Because she said to me she had heard a quote that she loved, that said, 'There's a special place in hell for women who don't help other women.' " Meooooow.
Coincidentally, Fey wrote the script for the film "Mean Girls," so she knows a thing or two about bullying. She and Poehler have championed females in comedy for years both on "SNL" and in their respective, newly wrapped shows "30 Rock" and "Parks and Recreation," which both featured women in power, albeit humorously. The Ministry now foresees a few parodies about the pop country singer turned tabloid fixture in Fey's and Poehler's future.
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[Updated, 1:30 p.m. March 5: Poehler responded to Swift's comments Tuesday afternoon with a bit of remorse and a bit of humor. Declaring herself a feminist, she said she "felt bad" if her quip upset Swift. "That being said, I do agree I am going to hell. But for other reasons. Mostly boring tax stuff," she told the Hollywood Reporter.]