Announcer

In a field dominated by baritones and bass-baritones, J.D. Steyers' voice is a rarity. Steyers at 46 is not a singer but a veteran radio announcer, a classical music disc jockey, whose mellow, tenor-like voice and penchant for on-air whimsicality set him apart from the more serious-sounding deep-voiced announcers that dominate the medium. But Steyers seems made for radio. He loves to talk; always has. When he was a child, his grandmother asked if he had been vaccinated with a Victrola needle.

Charles Wang, the Shanghai-born owner of the New York Islanders, has hired announcers to call games in Mandarin. But they're apparently having trouble translating certain words and phrases into the Chinese language. Thus, the Bruins have become the Brown Bears and the Panthers are Black Leopards. Writes ESPN the Magazine: "At least the Far East will get a clear intro to the NHL's best, Sid the Kid," quoting announcer Justin Chang as explaining, "Everyone knows what a Penguin is. " -- Trivia time Who was the oldest jockey to win a Breeders' Cup race, and how old was he?

Ratings for NFL telecasts, which had been steadily declining since the 1981 season, may be back on the upswing. ABC's telecast of the game between the Dallas Cowboys and Washington Redskins Monday night, despite being a 44-14 blowout by the Cowboys, got a national Nielsen rating of 20.7. ABC's opener last season, the Rams vs. Dallas, got an 18.9 rating. Only one Monday night telecast got a higher rating last year--the season finale between the Cowboys and Miami Dolphins, with a 25.1.

In "Damn Yankees," Richard Adler and Jerry Ross taught us, "You Gotta Have Heart." But if it were up to the Dodgers' new psychiatrist, Dr. Herndon P. Harding Jr., the song would be, "You're Gonna Have Heart." Ira Dreyfuss of the Associated Press wrote: "Harding figures that, if you can make it to the pros, you've probably learned to handle stress fairly well. But the way he sees it, counseling can make you even better.

There is an outside chance the Chicago Cubs will get into the World Series this season, which means right now is a good time to start making plans for an October trip to China or a Polar region. Because if the Cubs do make it to the Series, this particular continent will be overrun with smug, swaggering, crowing, official-equipment-wearing, original, die-hard Cub fans. It's a frightening thought--a bloodless takeover of the USA by these strange people.

Derek Milham, president of the Australian National Boxing Federation, said Monday that Tommy Morrison would not be allowed to fight in Australia because the boxer is HIV-positive. American promoter Ron Weathers wants to set up a match between George Foreman and Morrison in Australia in February. "Every fighter who fights in Australia has to pass a serology test," Milham said. "If they don't pass the test, they don't get a license and, if they don't get a license, they don't fight."

It was less than five years ago that Marv Albert's broadcasting career appeared over. Now he is in demand everywhere, picking up jobs left and right. He may have worked his last NBA Finals, because ABC begins carrying them next year. But don't feel sorry for him. On Tuesday, Turner Broadcasting announced Albert would be TNT's lead NBA play-by-play announcer next season, and as such he'll be announcing the Western Conference finals.

Those who got to Stanford Stadium at least two hours before the Super Bowl enjoyed a colorful pregame show. Those who didn't were rewarded with beer-soaked coats and shoving matches in the crowded aisles. One woman from Miami made her way to her seat with 16 ounces of beer running down her full-length mink. Her husband and the man who accidentally spilled the beer got involved in a shouting match before being separated by the shuffling masses.

Doug Linton, the unlikeliest of phenoms, sits in the cramped, darkened dugout and awaits freedom. For 12 long, thoroughly unenjoyable innings, Linton has sat near the two plastic water coolers, wanting nothing more than a merciful, quick end to an awful baseball game. So far, Linton, a former pitcher at Canyon High School and UC Irvine, has witnessed 28 hits, 5 errors and 8 runs.