Art Modell

The Cleveland Browns, off to their worst start since 1984, fired Coach Bud Carson on Monday, the day after their worst home loss ever. Owner Art Modell, who promised last year that Carson would be his last head coach, changed his mind after Sunday's 42-0 loss to the Buffalo Bills. "It was an embarrassment for all of us," Modell said. Carson, the first coaching casualty of the season, was replaced by offensive coordinator Jim Shofner.

Art Modell apologized. He had to apologize, after making perhaps the dumbest, most inappropriate remark in Baltimore sports history. Modell, speaking to the media after firing Ted Marchibroda early in the week, was asked what style he would prefer in his next coach. "If Hitler came back, I'd take him," the Ravens' owner said. If you know Modell, you know he was only trying to crack a joke, because he's always trying to crack jokes, even on the grimmest occasions.

One day after damning the Coliseum as a potential site for football and infuriating Los Angeles City Councilman Mark Ridley-Thomas, Baltimore Raven owner Art Modell telephoned Ridley-Thomas to apologize for his remarks and pledge his vote for the new Coliseum. Twenty-two more outbursts, public reprimands from Ridley-Thomas prompting apologies and affirmative votes and Los Angeles will have football once again.

The NFL and the city of Cleveland agreed Thursday night on terms that will allow Art Modell to move the Browns to Baltimore. Owners will vote today to ratify the agreement. The agreement was reached in talks involving two NFL committees containing 12 owners. League spokesman Joe Browne said all 12 had agreed, meaning 11 more votes are needed when the proposition goes before all 30 teams.

Art Modell might one day claim the financial windfall he anticipated by moving his NFL franchise to Baltimore. For now, however, he's paying a hefty price for taking from Cleveland it's beloved Browns. Modell recently took out a sizable loan from the league and is looking for a minority partner to help defray the high cost of running the Baltimore Ravens. Unlike most NFL owners, he does not have another enterprise to draw money from when the bills start piling up.

Commissioner Paul Tagliabue, while offering a surprising list of positive signs for the NFL's return to Los Angeles, said Tuesday it would be unlikely for the Kings' owners to be awarded a team next March and begin play in a new Coliseum in 2000. "The return of football to Los Angeles in 2001 is more realistic," Tagliabue said. "I think there is a window of opportunity . . .

Baltimore Raven owner Art Modell plans to sell up to a third of the debt-ridden team by early next year, according to the Baltimore Sun. Speculation on the price has ranged from $100 million to $150 million, but Modell said the price could be even higher. "We're still putting together the package," said Modell, who plans to attract investors by February or early March. Potential buyers may be asked to make bids.

Oh, well. Think of it this way: At least when the Rams got beat, they got to stay in California. The poor Browns, they had to go back to Cleveland. That was the kind of day they had Sunday. They left Denver with nothing, not even a doggy bag. No Super Bowl. Just another empty dish. Another day, another collar. So, once again they grieve in the land of Cleve. The "Dawgs" were going to do it this season, but they still can't catch these Broncos.

Those who believe two wrongs make a right should be thrilled by the signed contract pledging the transfer of the Browns from Cleveland to Baltimore. Citizens old enough to recall the former identity of the baseball team Baltimore now embraces may consider the latest move entirely appropriate, if not the fulfillment of some perverse destiny. All others not residing in the vicinity of Chesapeake Bay are invited to bemoan another step in the decline of civilization as we know it.

Fade to black. Hang up the spikes and put the skulls in storage. The Oakland Raiders are not going to the Super Bowl after the Baltimore Raven defense put on a display of toughness in the AFC championship game Sunday that was far more than a weekend costume act. The Ravens knocked Raider quarterback Rich Gannon out of the game with a shoulder injury, then thwarted him when he tried to come back. They took on the NFL's No. 1 rushing offense and held it to only 24 yards.