January 27, 2010
Dear Amy: I have been involved with a man for more than four years. We are both in our late 50s. At the beginning of the relationship, I lived with him, but I had to move out because of his spoiled adult kids. They didn't like the fact that I was around and "monopolized all his free time." They made it very difficult for both of us. I have been in my own apartment for the past year. He and I had talked about me moving back in with him. My lease is up in February.
February 5, 2010
Dear Amy: Am I the only one disturbed by the trend of "cougars"? I am a 40-year-old male, and was taught (mostly by women) that men who chased women 20 years younger were "dirty old men" with "arrested development" who looked ridiculous and childish. But now it seems that when women do it, it's "empowering." The first time I heard this term was on the "Today" show. The host was talking to some self-confessed cougars who were saying how great it was that they had found this new and incredibly liberating lifestyle.
March 16, 2010
Dear Amy: With the wedding season fast approaching, I wanted to drop a little advice to brides-to-be when choosing their wedding parties. I was married a few years ago and chose my best friend to be my matron of honor. I was totally deflated when she informed me that she didn't want to participate but only be a guest. Our friendship spanned 20 years. It would have been more acceptable had she been sick, had money or family issues, etc. Unfortunately, being in my wedding simply wasn't a priority in her busy life.
November 30, 2009
Dear Amy: I am a 53-year-old physician, and my weight bounces up and down about 15 pounds. I am not happy about it, but I also do not want to hear about it from anyone. I see many people during my day who are, for the most part, strangers to me. I think it is extremely rude to comment on anyone's weight, whether there is a weight gain or loss. I usually laugh it off, but it really upsets me. Ironically, these comments usually come from people who are grossly overweight. Am I being too sensitive?
January 18, 2010
Dear Amy: Many years ago my father-in-law had an affair. My mother-in-law chose to forgive him and stay in the marriage. It has been apparent that she never really forgave him. She says she should have divorced him when he cheated. Recently, my mother-in-law found love letters from the other woman. She gave them to my husband to read. He was very upset. I've been thinking I should say something to my mother-in-law about how this is affecting my husband, but I don't think she would take it well.
January 24, 2010
Dear Amy: I invited my mother-in-law to come live with us 13 years ago. I thought this arrangement might last five years, tops (she was 76). The arrangement has had many benefits for all of us. The downside is lack of privacy. She has consistently undermined our parenting principles; our sex life is near nothing; and I am feeling resentful. Our son will be heading off to college next fall. This past year I was diagnosed with cancer. I am conscious of the preciousness of time, and I want my husband to myself once our kid is gone.
February 1, 2010
Dear Amy: I am a 32-year-old single woman with many married friends. A few months ago, I went to a concert with a few couples and a married man who didn't bring his wife. In the back seat of a car on the way home, he tried to kiss me. I pulled away, and the next day when he sent me an e-mail saying he had a good time, I didn't respond. I saw this same man and his wife and kids at a recent dinner party. Before I left, he said he wanted to have coffee sometime and that he'd like to get to know me better.
February 11, 2010
Dear Amy: I have a 30-year-old daughter who just finished a brief marriage to a useless alcoholic. Within days of the ink drying, she announced she is engaged to a really nice guy (he is). She wants me to provide the food and drink for this wedding. (I also paid for her first wedding.) It will be a small affair, around 100 people. She asked how much I was putting into the budget, and I told her $5,000. She was upset because she found a venue she liked that rents for $1,200, leaving her less for the food and beverages.
December 3, 2009
Dear Amy: A couple of years ago, my best friend confessed she had "those" kinds of feelings for me. Though I cherished her more than anyone, I wasn't ready for a romantic relationship with her. About six months later she wound up with a partner, and the two of them are contentedly together. Meanwhile, I have realized that I had feelings for my BF all along and that I made a mistake in shrugging her off. In case my BF doesn't stay with her partner forever, I want her to know that if she were still interested in me, I'd like to be with her. Is it bad form to let her know how I feel while she's still with her partner?
December 22, 2009
Dear Amy: My daughter is coming to our house for the holidays, bringing her three small children. The dinner is at my mom and dad's house. She asked to bring her "boyfriend." They knew each other many years ago and have recently reconnected but have had only e-mail and phone contact. I said it was fine for her to bring him to dinner, and her grandmother agreed. Now we find out that she wants him to stay with her as a guest at her grandmother's house for the entire time they're here.