January 21, 2010
Dear Amy: I have been married for 17 years and we have two great kids, ages 9 and 11. I fell out of love with my husband several years ago. I have not told him this because I don't want to hurt him, and I don't feel right about ending the marriage right now because it would hurt the kids. But every day I have an ache inside me because I know I'm not happy in this marriage. I would be willing to try counseling, but we actually get along fairly well. I'm torn between sparing my family any pain and my secret sadness that I'm not living an authentic life.
January 28, 2010
Dear Amy: I am 5 foot 3 inches and weigh 112 pounds. I recently took a flight where the man sitting next to me weighed at least 250 pounds. There was an armrest between us that I had put down when I sat down, and when he came and sat in his seat next to mine, he put it back up. This left me very uncomfortable, as I had to lean away from him the whole flight because he had taken up my unused space in my seat. I paid for my seat and don't feel that I should be uncomfortable to make someone else more comfortable.
December 22, 2009
Dear Amy: My daughter is coming to our house for the holidays, bringing her three small children. The dinner is at my mom and dad's house. She asked to bring her "boyfriend." They knew each other many years ago and have recently reconnected but have had only e-mail and phone contact. I said it was fine for her to bring him to dinner, and her grandmother agreed. Now we find out that she wants him to stay with her as a guest at her grandmother's house for the entire time they're here.
December 31, 2009
Dear Amy: Recently on Facebook I posted a nice note on the "walls" of my family members. It was a note that was sent to me from a friend -- indicating that I was an angel. Amy, I sent this to more than 30 family members! A few of them responded and said the posting was nice, but the rest asked if I was doing OK. To me, it seems like they're asking if I'm mentally unstable and I find that to be very harsh and mean. It's very upsetting. Please shed some light on this.
March 1, 2010
Dear Amy: I'm at a loss as to how to deal with my 16-year-old daughter and to teach her how to "play nice." She is beautiful but lacking in social skills needed to get along well with her peers. At school, she acts rudely toward others. Her humor toward her friends reeks with sarcasm and can be very hurtful. She will talk only to a few people. She has a small group of friends, but is the source of constant drama. Her friends are tiring of her antics. I have serious concerns about my daughter's future.
March 29, 2010
Dear Amy: I am a divorced woman in my mid-50s and am happy with my life. I have friends and great relationships with my kids, their spouses and the grandkids. I have dated two men since divorcing, neither one for long. That has not bothered me until lately. I recently read a popular book series. It was geared toward younger readers originally. I have been obsessed with these stories and have really grown attached to the primary male character. I'm so sorry I don't have the same type of love that this character has for the female character.
April 1, 2010
Dear Amy: I work for a partner at a very distinguished company. He has been conducting an affair with a "client" for more than three years now. He has been married for well over 20 years. He, however, is utilizing company funds to wine and dine his mistress and is asking me to submit these expenses for reimbursement. My conundrum is that if I report him I will lose my job; he is very connected. If I don't, then I feel I am cheating the company. I have asked to be transferred, but no other positions are available.
April 7, 2010
Dear Amy: I'm about to be engaged to a wonderful woman. I have known her for three years. I have been wondering whether I should tell her that I had lap band surgery for my obesity seven years ago when I was 45. The surgery enabled me to lose 100 pounds. I had a subsequent tummy tuck that I lied to my lady about (to explain the scar). I have never told anyone else, including my family, about this. My lady is 5 foot 10 and a good weight, but it took her some time to get used to my eating habits -- which include eating less than she does.
January 7, 2010
Dear Amy: When my husband and I divorced more than two years ago, I gave him nine months to move out of my house. He's still here. He claims that he has no money, and he doesn't. He gambled it all away in the stock market after our divorce. My ex-husband is rude. He belittles me and trashes me. He is manic-depressive. He wakes me at 3 a.m. to berate me about my shortcomings. He pays very little in living expenses; he just buys some groceries and pays the cable bill.
November 19, 2009
Dear Amy: I have been living with my paramour for almost three years. We are both in our 50s. He is still married, despite a lengthy legal separation. He often says it is "time to do something" about that, but that is as far as it goes. I want more than just a roommate, plus, if something happens to him, I'm stuck financially. I love him dearly, and he says he loves me too. But I find myself wondering -- am I all alone in this relationship? How do I broach this without sounding needy and greedy?