February 16, 2010
Dear Amy: I share office space with a colleague. Our space is detached from the rest of the office. My co-worker and I have very little in common, and by all indications she has no social life and shows signs of emotional instability (she has revealed to me that she is on antidepressants). The problem is that she is constantly in my space, telling me her problems, making catty comments about co-workers and, worst of all, trying to arrange for us to spend time together socially outside of work.
January 21, 2010
Dear Amy: I have been married for 17 years and we have two great kids, ages 9 and 11. I fell out of love with my husband several years ago. I have not told him this because I don't want to hurt him, and I don't feel right about ending the marriage right now because it would hurt the kids. But every day I have an ache inside me because I know I'm not happy in this marriage. I would be willing to try counseling, but we actually get along fairly well. I'm torn between sparing my family any pain and my secret sadness that I'm not living an authentic life.
November 19, 2009
Dear Amy: I have been living with my paramour for almost three years. We are both in our 50s. He is still married, despite a lengthy legal separation. He often says it is "time to do something" about that, but that is as far as it goes. I want more than just a roommate, plus, if something happens to him, I'm stuck financially. I love him dearly, and he says he loves me too. But I find myself wondering -- am I all alone in this relationship? How do I broach this without sounding needy and greedy?
January 3, 2010
Dear Amy: Seven years ago, when my then boyfriend was dating me, he "confessed" that he had intimate relationships with three women before dating me. And I took him at his word. We have been married for two years. Recently when I cleaned the basement, I came across many love letters written by his ex-girlfriends. These letters detailed his sexual activities. Based on these letters, my husband slept with way more than three women. I understand what happened was before my time, but I don't understand why he was not telling me the truth in the beginning of our relationship.
January 10, 2010
Dear Amy: In this age of Republican vs. Democrat in almost all phases of government, the stress of relatives being of the other party and attending tea parties, disrupting town halls and marching on Washington has strained family relationships. I know we are all different and have the freedom to choose, but I feel as if these are personal attacks on me, so I have deleted all conservative friends from my Facebook account. There are a lot of people with these feelings in both parties -- any suggestions on how to deal with it?
December 24, 2009
Dear Amy: Every year my family exchanges our gift lists, and every year I shop, wrap and ship our gifts in time for Christmas. However, one family member, who always is the first to ask what we would like for Christmas, continuously sends gifts days, weeks and at times months after Christmas. As much as we really enjoy and appreciate the gifts, it is becoming somewhat insulting to receive them so late. We have a very small family, and it is only my husband and I who receive the gifts late.
January 4, 2010
Dear Amy: Recently I reconnected with a woman I knew more than 25 years ago. We e-mailed, texted and spoke by phone. A few months ago, I was in her hometown and she came to my hotel. We had a few drinks and spent the night together. We continued our conversations, and recently I was at a convention where she also was and we spent the week together. We virtually skipped the convention and just enjoyed each other's company. More recently, I was back in her town and we spent another few days together.
April 4, 2010
Dear Amy: My husband has begun traveling frequently for work. Even though his employer compensates him well for each trip, he spends extravagantly, often putting large charges on our credit card. He drinks excessively. When I ask him why this continues to happen, even though he promises not to do any of these things each time he leaves, he can't explain it. It is just not like my normally responsible and respectful husband. Is it time to see a counselor? Frustrated Wife Dear Frustrated: It is time to see a counselor.
April 11, 2010
Dear Amy: My parents own a beach house that is the site of our annual family vacation. Our family has grown, the house has not. There are now five couples, four singles and three children who are planning on being there this summer. There are nowhere near enough beds or couches. I've decided to rent a two-bedroom condo about a half-mile away for the overflow. The issue we're having is how to pay for it. I think that everyone, including those who stay at my parents' home, should help, although I'm flexible in how to divide the cost.
December 13, 2009
Dear Amy: My mother has suddenly turned against drinking. I am hosting a 60th birthday party for myself. My mother will not go if there is one glass of alcohol served. How I should handle this? Julia Dear Julia: You are not the cause of your mother's distress, but you should do your best to reassure her without letting her unreasonably control you. You should also make sure her health is stable because she doesn't sound completely rational. I suggest you lovingly dodge dwelling on this.