February 24, 2010
Dear Amy: Later this year I will wed the love of my life. This is his first marriage and my third; it will be a small, intimate affair. We are both pushing 50, and neither of us has children, but we both like kids. I have four couples who are friends with small children. After some lengthy conversations among us, we would like to have our day with adults only. Most of these couples will welcome the chance to get a baby sitter and party for a few hours. However, other couples will be offended, and that worries me. Should I call these couples before I send out the invitations and explain that our wedding is adults-only?
March 14, 2010
Dear Amy: My buddy and I have been good friends for more than 20 years, but recently one of his country club pals said some nasty things about me. My friend, "James," was present, and he is still on very friendly terms with his neighbor. I asked him about this, and he said he has a right to be friends with each of us and not take sides. Shouldn't a friend stand up for his good friend? Barry Dear Barry: I agree with your friend that he has a right to be friends with whomever he wants.
March 18, 2010
Dear Amy: I am a sophomore in high school. I recently reconnected with a friend I was close to last year. Over the summer, our friendship sort of fell apart. This year, he has found new friends, and our brief talk the other day was the most contact we had in months. He has gotten into partying. He shows up high to school almost every day. He is also on academic probation and has gotten more detentions than I can count. His parents don't really care about any of this.
March 28, 2010
Dear Amy: I'm in a carpool with two other people. The owner of the car drives every day, and the other rider and I calculate the cost of gas and split it. However, after work we must leave the parking lot at a specific time to avoid getting parking tickets. Sometimes, we leave late and get ticketed. Is it appropriate for the passengers to pick up the cost of the ticket? Wondering Dear Wondering: This is an issue for all of you to discuss openly and work out among the three of you. However, you asked, so I think you should split the cost three ways, depending on the frequency of the ticketing.
March 7, 2010
Dear Amy: My sister "Carol" was married for about 10 years to "Steve." About three years ago, he started cheating on Carol and eventually left her. She was devastated. He recently married the woman and they have a baby. My sister "Sarah" and her husband have maintained a close relationship with Steve and his new family. Do you feel this relationship they maintain with Steve is appropriate? Christine Dear Christine: A sensitive family member will realize that during a difficult divorce, attention and concern should be lavished onto the aggrieved family member.
March 4, 2010
Dear Amy: My husband and I have been married for 24 years. He does business development for a large firm. He is involved in numerous community groups, explaining that this is how he builds relationships and clients. He is home Sundays and two or three evenings each week. When home, he spends hours responding to e-mails and reading Facebook sites. I feel lonely when I see the great relationships he maintains with others, whereas all I get is a tired, stressed and distant husband.
December 24, 2009
Dear Amy: Every year my family exchanges our gift lists, and every year I shop, wrap and ship our gifts in time for Christmas. However, one family member, who always is the first to ask what we would like for Christmas, continuously sends gifts days, weeks and at times months after Christmas. As much as we really enjoy and appreciate the gifts, it is becoming somewhat insulting to receive them so late. We have a very small family, and it is only my husband and I who receive the gifts late.
December 13, 2009
Dear Amy: My mother has suddenly turned against drinking. I am hosting a 60th birthday party for myself. My mother will not go if there is one glass of alcohol served. How I should handle this? Julia Dear Julia: You are not the cause of your mother's distress, but you should do your best to reassure her without letting her unreasonably control you. You should also make sure her health is stable because she doesn't sound completely rational. I suggest you lovingly dodge dwelling on this.
January 10, 2010
Dear Amy: In this age of Republican vs. Democrat in almost all phases of government, the stress of relatives being of the other party and attending tea parties, disrupting town halls and marching on Washington has strained family relationships. I know we are all different and have the freedom to choose, but I feel as if these are personal attacks on me, so I have deleted all conservative friends from my Facebook account. There are a lot of people with these feelings in both parties -- any suggestions on how to deal with it?
February 14, 2010
Dear Amy: Our grandson recently got married. One Sunday afternoon, the newlyweds paid us an unexpected visit. After visiting for a short while, I thought my wife should have offered them coffee or tea. I would like to know who should take the initiative to make an offering. I feel that the wife (who is the homemaker) should have taken it upon herself (or should have asked me) to make a lunch or something to offer to our guests. I know we made a bad impression on them.