Gladiators

Alabama's ban on a wine that features a nude nymph on the label has become a business opportunity for a California vintner who is preparing a marketing campaign to capitalize on being "Banned in Bama." The Alabama Alcoholic Beverage Control Board recently told stores and restaurants to quit serving Cycles Gladiator wine because of the label.

Last year's ubiquitous gladiator sandals made city streets look like an ancient battleground full of urban warriors. This spring, however, the look is more relaxed and decidedly down to earth, which makes huaraches a perfect fit. The traditional handmade Mexican shoes date back hundreds of years and are distinguished by their elaborately woven and layered leather tops.

The gladiators charge each other with a great clashing and crashing of arms and armor. It's hard to say who looks more fearsome: Atropo or Taurus. Atropo, the towering Germanic barbarian, wears a mask of black war paint, a headband over her blond hair and a brown tunic and leggings. She wields a trident in one hand and whirls a net in the other. Taurus, the compact Roman, is a tattooed mass of muscle beneath a battered metal helmet that covers all but his eyes.

Sometimes a guy just has to ungird his inner gladiator. Sergio Iacomoni used to look up from his desk at Banca d'Italia and wonder about the likes of Spartacus. He consumed books on ancient Rome. He tracked news of archaeological digs -- daily fare in Italy -- for nuggets on how gladiators might have trained or lived. He socialized with buddies -- accountants and bureaucrats cooped up in their own office or government jobs -- who shared the same Walter Mitty daydreams. "One day, we were talking.

Bring on the Power Ball! At the FitExpo event held mid-February in the Los Angeles Convention Center, I joined about 6,000 people from around the country who'd taken the four-minute "tryout," the first step in becoming a contestant on the newly resurrected NBC spectacle of strength, speed and coordination, "American Gladiators."

You know the type: nestled into the couch, beer at the ready, shouting at the screen. Forget baseball or football -- trash-talking is our true national pastime, the God-given right of all Americans to express their most vitriolic feelings from the comfort of their living rooms. We do it to politicians, prevaricating and dodging questions. (They're just asking for it.) We do it to celebrities, pretty, sometimes vacant and often smug. (Really asking for it.

Hulk Hogan, yards of spandex, iron-pumped bodies. . . . Notwithstanding some 21st-century graphics and gimmickry, you may be excused from thinking yourself knocked back in time while watching NBC's renascent "American Gladiators." After an absence of almost a dozen years, the formerly syndicated show has returned to pit ordinary citizens in better shape than I am against pumped-up superfolk in much better shape than I am in a series of physical challenges I am in no way capable of meeting.

A revival of the 1989-96 syndicated competition series "American Gladiators" will premiere at midseason on NBC, which is promising "splashy twists including special effects, water skills and the latest technology." As in the original, the new version of "American Gladiators" will pit contestants against eight gladiators in a series of competitions, with the Joust, the Wall, Hang Tough and the Eliminator returning.

Go to Rome and find your inner warrior. The Rome Cavalieri Hilton is offering a historically correct gladiator training course (a tough workout, courtesy of Gruppo Storico Romano, a society dedicated to re-creating those days) in the hotel's private park. For two hours, a participant wears a tunic, sandals, protective gloves and prepares to do battle by learning sword combat and ancient techniques. Graduates get a medal and a title (tiro, for beginners); advanced students wear protective armor.