Irish Eyes

People who weren't Irish joked that they were. It was the thing to do among the 900 power elite who joined restaurateur Jimmy Murphy, the dinner chairman, at the American Ireland Fund gala toast to entertainer/entrepreneur Merv Griffin at Griffin's own Beverly Hilton. Griffin, whose ancestors hail from County Clonmel, seat of Irish art works and hand-designed clothes, rolled those Irish eyes and sang two of his favorites, "Look to the Rainbow" and "When Irish Eyes Are Smiling."

Forget the old dog ate my homework excuse. "After picking up my girlfriend's 7-year-old son in Van Nuys to do some Christmas shopping," wrote Harold Karaka of Laguna Hills, "I asked whether he had homework. I wanted to know how long we could stay out. He said he had homework but didn't have to do it. When I asked why, his reply was: 'My dialators are too big.' Caught off guard, I finally realized that he had returned from the eye doctor's office.

If you're ever able to snag a ticket, I highly recommend a Clippers game. They play almost weekly at Staples Center, and though they often perform in the shadow of the Sparks, they are inarguably one of L.A.'s top four or five basketball operations. Yes, you can totally enjoy a Clippers game. Here's how: Arrive early. I recommend five to 10 minutes before tipoff, to absorb the atmosphere and locate your seat. Often, there are many to choose from. Come hungry.

Onlookers were green with envy as the Shamrock traveled down Emerald Street. "What is that? I'd love to drive it!" exclaimed Hazel Brenner as the car called the "Irish T-Bird" passed by. The Shamrock was built in Ireland between 1959 and 1962. But Irish eyes didn't smile on it: Only one is apparently still on the road in the United States. Harbor City resident Dick Midkiff plans to change that.

"OK, Hennessy, it's OK to tootle the flute. Go ahead, McCarthy, thump the old bassoon, while I the pipes do play. Give MacNamara a drink and ask him does he know Galway Bay. "It's OK to wear green. It's OK to be Irish this day. "Things are just fine in Glocca Morra. Tell Danny Boy, the pipes, the pipes are playing, all right.

In the real Ireland--not the one of myth--visitors may never find what they think they'll find. But all visitors can, if they listen patiently--and have an ear for words--experience a peculiarly Irish moment. And this one is mine. Ireland is not the quaint old place romanticized by John Ford in "The Quiet Man." Oh, it can look like that, some of it, but the land of saints and scholars is not peopled by the simple folk of American myth and legend.

Elston Johnson hobbles slowly through Central Park in Whittier, hunching slightly as he holds a violin case. With his red cap, long white beard and plump belly, which makes him look a little like Santa Claus, Johnson immediately catches the attention of children playing nearby. He turns his head and smiles. Then he plops down in a chair, carefully takes out his violin and starts to play "Old MacDonald Had a Farm" while the youngsters gather around.

How dare Lewis Segal compare Irish step dancing to a "fascist march"! The Jewish people were not the only people persecuted in the annals of history. Study some Irish history, Mr. Segal, and apologize to the Irish for your insulting remark. BERNARD M. CONNORS Valencia