Santa Claus

Our Pickett's Charge into the Midwest is a roaring success. We drop off the little girl at a fine school that, for a mere 30 or 40 grand, will keep tabs on her for an entire academic year. Good deal, I say. Heck, she spends that much on Starbucks. "I'd have paid more," I tell Posh. "We don't have any more," she says. "Oh." By the way, if you're taking a daughter to college soon, might I recommend renting one of those C-130 transport planes, a whopping-big aircraft with abundant trunk space.

More than 150 bearded Santas -- looking relaxed, some clad in Hawaiian shirts, others in red suits -- gathered at a Buena Park hotel Sunday to reminisce about the busy holiday season and network over their next merry career move. The annual founders luncheon of the Amalgamated Order of Real Bearded Santas drew an assortment of oversized gents, an equal number of Mrs. Clauses and a few real-life little people working as elves. They met to promote pride and improve performance.

It's that special holiday time, that holiday special time. Every Christmas adds at least a few new films or cartoons to the canon, most of which, like Santa's own reindeer and sleigh, will fly off the radar. Many are not worth seeing anyway, and of those that are, few will ever be called timeless (though given all the many hours of cable there are to fill, most will be back). But here are two worth at least a look.

Like their authors, each letter is unique. Some writers get straight to the point, like 10-year-old Neida, who wrote in black and red marker: "Dear, Santa Claws, I want a Nentendo D.S. black and red, I also want a remot control!" Madeline kept things simple, didn't give her age, skipped the greeting and started with a list: "1) Jewels, 2) Gears, 3) Crystals, 4) Beverly Hills china . . . 8) Snow."

The Santa Claus of this bleak desert outpost wears a polo shirt with a pack of Camel Lights in the pocket and a pair of suspenders stretched tight over his stomach. Larry Bai is 60, balding and Jewish. He shuffles through the post office doors this blustery morning, gripping a cane topped with a lion's head. He opens Santa's post office box, No. 133. There are eight more letters.

The Boston Celtics clearly reside on the "naughty list" as far as the NBA scheduling czar is concerned. "They told me we were playing on Christmas Day and I didn't really look at it, I just assumed it was at home," Coach Doc Rivers told reporters Tuesday. The Celtics have never played a home game on Christmas Day -- but have gone 19-15 on the road and at neutral sites. It's enough to warrant a "what's up" from Doc.

A 75-year Los Angeles tradition came to an end Wednesday as officials disclosed that last year's Hollywood Christmas Parade was the final one. Rising costs and shrinking revenues are to blame for the cancellation, leaders of the Hollywood Chamber of Commerce said. "This is a very difficult thing for us to have to do," said Jeff Briggs, chairman of the chamber's board of directors. "We're disappointed and sad. But we're out of the parade business."

Harry Frazier, an actor whose full white beard helped win him Santa Claus roles in movies and commercials but who performed far more often on stage and television, has died. He was 77. Frazier died May 26 at the Motion Picture and Television Hospital in Woodland Hills, said Jaime Larkin, a spokeswoman for the hospital. The cause was complications from diabetes. For some years he had been a resident of the assisted-living facility adjoining the hospital.

Paul Giamatti is the latest actor to don the red-and-white suit and hat to play Santa Claus, a.k.a. Kris Kringle and St. Nick, with the new family comedy "Fred Claus," opening Friday. Giamatti's Nicholas Claus tries to be a merry soul, but he's battling the bulge as well as an efficiency expert about to shutter the North Pole. And to make matters worse, Santa's rapscallion of an older brother, Fred (Vince Vaughn), is in town to earn some money.

Microsoft Corp. quickly shut down Santa Claus' Web privileges after it found out the automated elf it created for kids to instant message with was talking naughty, not nice. Last year, Microsoft encouraged kids to connect directly to "Santa" by adding northpolelive.com to their Windows Live Messenger contact lists. The Santa program, which Microsoft reactivated this month, asked children what they wanted for Christmas and could respond on topic, thanks to artificial intelligence.