Traffic School

Dear Street Smart: Enjoyed your tale about the man and wife who crashed their cars while playing chicken on a residential street (Jan. 7). Here's my favorite residential wreck story, which happened across the street from my house. A young man was on a lunch break from Saturday traffic school and drove to our neighborhood to visit his girlfriend. Suddenly, he crashed with a car coming around the corner. What amused us was his lack of concern about the accident.

Last month, like thousands of other traffic violators, Jose Corona had his day in court. He pleaded guilty and was given a choice: Pay a fine or go to school. However, Jose's case is a bit different. He is 13 years old, and he broke the law by riding double on a bicycle. Jose decided to attend bicycle safety school, and he said his choice was the right one. "I'm gonna quit riding double (on a bicycle) . . . so I won't get in trouble anymore," Jose said.

Ever since the South Orange County Municipal Court eliminated traffic school in 1983, getting a ticket in the southern part of the county has been an expensive proposition. Although motorists who got tickets in other county court jurisdictions could expiate their driving sins with a day at traffic school, a south county traffic offender had no options other than to fight the ticket or pay a hefty fine and perhaps higher insurance premiums as well.

Choosing which traffic school to attend in Ventura County could drive you crazy. Scenario: You're a Ventura County resident minding your own business, doing nothing more than 75 m.p.h. in a 55 m.p.h. zone, and they give you a traffic citation within the county. Fortunately, this is your first offense in a long time and you are eligible to attend traffic school to keep those insurance premiums down. Aren't you lucky!

A husband and wife who work at a Burbank traffic school have been charged with attempted forgery after giving an undercover state Department of Motor Vehicles investigator a certificate for a course she did not complete, authorities said Thursday. Jon Downey, 44, and his wife, Roberta, 39, of Burbank, were arrested Wednesday at the L.A. Delta Driving School in the 1800 block of Verdugo Avenue, said Bill Hall, a DMV senior special investigator.

Attention, California motorists. Now, online wizardry offers you traffic school in the comfort of your own home. No more dreary strip-mall storefronts or droning lectures by highway patrolmen. No more shockumentaries starring accident victims. No more lame jokes by washed-up comics. Just rent three videos, answer an online questionnaire through a rented computer and erase those traffic tickets from your easy chair. It sounds like a pitchman's fever dream.

Dear Street Smart: I have two questions. First, when is running a yellow light considered running a red light? I got a ticket when the yellow light turned red when I almost finished crossing the intersection. Second, do you still have a record of a ticket after you successfully complete traffic school? I've gotten confusing answers. All the traffic school ads say you can "erase" the ticket from your record, but the officer at the courthouse told me you can't. Nhuan T.

On the morning of the CIF state track and field championships, Phouphet Singbandith of Magnolia High School was cooling his heels in traffic school of all places. He spent six hours, beginning at 8 a.m. Saturday, as part of a captive audience in La Mirada, atoning for a speeding ticket. It seemed a strange place for the state's best triple jumper to be before the biggest meet of the season. But it had been a long journey for Singbandith to get this far.

Did you know that air bags have revised the proper steering-wheel hand positions? Or that the right-of-way on mountain roads now goes to the uphill driver? Safe driving is no laughing matter, but instructor Brian Laughlin, a nine-year veteran, uses humor to convey the latest word in traffic law and lifesaving information to his captive audiences at the Beverly Hills location of the Comedy Traffic School.

Greg Drilling teaches traffic school. He's used to seeing people bored out of their minds. By the time Drilling enters the room, they're slumped in their chairs, "I could kill" written all over their faces. Drilling's "students" are people who commit traffic violations. They speed. They go the wrong way on one-way streets. They swerve to avoid skunks and hit cars. They "double park" while kissing their girlfriends good night. Drilling knows them--he's written their names in books before.